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practical actions for Christian spiritual growth. 
Dear <<First Name>>

I started practicing for Lent a couple weeks ago.

That sounds funny, doesn't it.

Because I talk about eliminating distractions to talk with God, I decided to start early this year. I wanted some fresh experience to talk about. And I discovered, again, that discerning what to let go of is a challenging process. At least I was challenged.

I want to give you a glimpse of my journal from February 12. It may help you in your process of reflection. 
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Oh Lord. What do you want. Besides me. and my attention. and my heart and soul and mind and strength and my love for my neighbor?
[sit in silence, mind wandering]
How far is it up to me to sell my books?
[sit in silence]
Try a forty day experiment: don't look at sales. Do only what God says for marketing. 
[sit in silence]
You need to be free of those numbers because you are using them to measure value: "Make the numbers move, feel good." Instead, write the next paragraph of whatever. 
[sit in silence]
[written with resolve] For the next week, don't look at the numbers.
[sit in silence]
Oh my God, I ache when I lose that rationalization: "At least someone loves me" is what I hear when I turn from hard work to the statistics. Thinking about losing that behavior leaves me emotionally naked. I feel the scariness as thoughts of the rest of the work undone come crashing in with no way to distract myself. 
[written with resolve] When I reach for #s at KDP/create, I won't click. I will say "You have loved me with an everlasting love"

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I changed that last commitment. For the next few days, when I would have reached for the shortcut button on my browser to check the numbers, instead I sent an email to a friend. It was still about affirmation, but I was working to replace one habit with another, an inward focused habit with one that reached out. 

I got practical, too. I deleted all the shortcut buttons on my browsers for the report pages. And I added a button for that "Love you" verse from Jeremiah. And I told Nancy what I was doing. 

While there are good reasons for checking sales numbers, too often I look at them when I need an ego boost. And, ironically, if they aren't moving, I feel a hollowness. If you've read the Lent book, you now that this statistics challenge isn't new for me. I keep working on it, keep learning where to look for my identity. 

Here's my invitation to you during the next week, as we are still 10 days out from Ash Wednesday. Start asking God, "What's my emotional crutch? What am I turning to for affirmation instead of turning to You? Can you help me see something? Can you help me live without it...for the sake of being aware of you?" 

If you need to let someone know what you are hearing, you can reply to this email. 

Thanks for reading,

Jon


P.S. You are wondering how my statistics addiction is going. I would wonder, too. I modified the commitment to checking on Sunday. Week one, I was good. This week, I'm snacking on the stats every couple days. So help me next week. Remind me and pray for me. Both help. 

Lent For Non-Lent People 
A Great Work (paperback(Kindle)   (Nook).
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