THE GIST. The US has accused North Korea of being behind the cyber-attack on Sony Pictures. The 'hacking' looks like retaliation for the planned release of The Interview - a comedy about a plot to assassinate Kim Jong-un. NK representatives carefully considered their reply, and then diplomatically pointed out that America is “a cesspool of terrorism”.

NOTHING TO SEE HERE. Obama reckons this was an act of 'cyber-vandalism', rather than war. So relax. Easier said for Sony, who would have been hoping to make $200m at the US box office, but instead are looking at sending the movie straight to DVD.

OSCAR-WORTHY. Despite denying involvement with the attack, Kim Jong-un has plenty of motive to de-rail a Hollywood comedy about his own assassination. It's enough to make any man-child dictator upset, but especially one with a proud family history of cinema appreciation. See: kidnapping South Korea's most famous director in 1978. 

COOL WARHEADS. North Korea has said any retaliation from the US will result in pain “thousands of times greater”, including cyber attacks on the Pentagon or the White House. Obama has acted decisively in response, by booking a holiday to Hawaii. Either this results in Word War Three, or we just let Piratebay do its thing and everyone will realise it’s not a great movie anyway.

THE GIST. Tony Abbott has shuffled the Ministers in his cabinet, in a bid to "reset and refocus" the government.

BENCHED. The biggest losers are a male trio who will be riding the government pine for the foreseeable future. The first is (now former) Parliamentary Secretary to the Foreign Affairs Minister, Brett Mason - a man who you've probably never heard of before, and probably never will again. Second is former Assistant Treasurer Arthur Sinodinos, who has been banished from the inner sanctum after getting caught up in the nasty Eddie Obeid / ICAC business in NSW. Third is former Defence Minister David Johnston, who embarrased the government by publicly saying that he wouldn't trust the company building our submarines "to build a canoe".

GOLF CLAPS. There were some winners. Scott Morrison has been moved to Social Services after a 'successful' stint as Immigration Minister. In actual positive news, several women have been promoted. Kelly O'Dwyer and Karen Andrews have been called up from the backbench to sit at the grown ups' table, and Sussan Ley is the new Health and Sport Minister.

THIN ICE. Former Health Minister Peter Dutton, after fumbling the whole 'GP co-payment' thing, has been made Immigration Minister. Good luck. Kevin Andrews has been made Defence Minister, which is technically a 'promotion', except for the fact that the portfolio has ended the careers of most people unfortunate enough to be given the job. Oh, and Andrews once said he had 'no interest' in the gig. Awkward.

Pros and cons. Travel experts are urging prospective tourists to hurry up and visit Cuba, following the opening up of trade between that country and America. The concern is that a flood of US capital and people will 'Americanise' the country. Communist dictatorship on one hand, obesity and strip malls on the other. Tough one.

Ho Ho Homemade bomb. A Bendigo man has been arrested and charged with reckless conduct endangering human life. It seems that Christmas celebrations took a turn for the excessively festive, as the man was caught letting off explosive devices dressed in a Santa suit. Victoria Police Sergeant Rainy said, "This is stupidity at its best".

Down, Diddy Kong. French police have had to taser a rampaging monkey, which became enraged after binge-eating chocolate given to it by local children. Things got out of hand when the monkey started attacking kids outside their school.