When You're Ready to Take Flight...
"Long ago and far away I walked the forest, wide and deep. And when I reached the highest mountain; and when I swam the seven seas; and everywhere I turned; there was yearning. There was only yearning."
- Infinitus
I've been searching my heart and mind for something to say this month. I promised letters, not just news, and so I like to keep it genuine. I thought of doing something around the theme of Valentine's Day, but the truth is I'm not very good at romance—just ask my characters! Love triangles, tragedy, and bouts of sarcasm are more my thing. Besides, your inbox is probably already full of heart-themed advertisements reminding you of a holiday that breaks as many hearts as it does bank accounts.
So instead, I'll talk about a different kind of love: the kind that lives deep within all of us. My life is driven by an ever-constant yearning. A desire for that which is unseen and unknown. It's the force that leads me to create and pursue the things I do. From fantasy stories to paintings to sculptures to acrobatics, all of it is connected to a part of my spirit that lives for the magic found within the arts.
I was in the seventh grade when I saw my first Cirque Du Soleil show. Quidam was its name, which happens to be the show's feature character. In Cirque's literature, Quidam is described as, "A nameless passer-by; a solitary figure lingering on a street corner; a person rushing past... One who cries out, sings and dreams within us all."
There's something innately familiar about that concept, is there not? Think about it. Have you ever had a yearning inside your heart that cries out at every reminder? Maybe you witnessed a show or a work of art or a song and a part of you wakes up to say you weren't meant to watch from the sidelines. No! You were made to participate.
Last year, I did something crazy. I was walking out of Varekai with my mother when that wild desire expanded in my chest. It was an old and familiar stirring I'd felt since I was a kid, but this time it struck me harder than usual. Like a force swelling beyond its limits, it demanded to be released or tear me apart trying. I stopped mid-stride and said to her, "Mom, I'm running away to join the circus."
She laughed. A lot. But if there is one thing I can say about my mom, it's that she gets my kind of crazy. (I tack it up to 28 years of training.) She knew part of me was serious. I may not have actually planned to run off to the big top, but I wanted to take to the air; to know what it felt like to find strength and elegance in the defiance of gravity. So I found an instructor and I did just that.
Let me start by saying lyra (aerial hoop) is not a skill one learns easily. Every inch of progress is hard earned and hard won. You endure torn skin, wicked bruising, and buckets of sweat as you push your body beyond what you thought was possible. You learn the meaning of dedication when you spend half your nights in the studio and the other half at home working on your strength and flexibility. It's ice packs at night, extra shots of espresso in the morning, and apologies to friends as you say (yet again) "Sorry, I can't go out. I'll be in the studio until late tonight."
Yet there's such reward in chasing that yearning. For me, it's found the moment my hands—torn and calloused—grip the hoop. Like the stories I put on paper, there's something spiritual to be found in the expression of one's passions. My soul stirs every time I take flight.
Most people have a yearning. If you think hard enough, I bet you know of at least one, if not more. But how many of us chase that yearning? How many of us really take the chance or pay the price? We look at others who go out and do what we think is "impossible" for the modern man, yet here's the thing...
Somewhere in our culture, we've fashioned this idea that the people who are out in the world doing what we've only dreamed of are somehow special. We look upon their achievements like magic; the people like gods.Yet the truth is that the onlookers never see the bruises. They never see what happens inside the cocoon. They only see the beauty in what emerges when an individual finally achieves what they've spents months, years, perhaps even their life, working toward.
What is your passion? What is one thing that your heart truly yearns for? Remember, there is love in the labor that leads us to success. May the things you hope for be the things you work toward.
May we all live each day as if it's a story worth telling,
Elizabeth Carlton
Author of The Royal Rogue and Chivalry's Code
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