Weekly Rabbinic Schmooze....... 
NO WELCOME TO ANGELS AT OUR SEDER
SHOULD ONE SING SHALOM ALEICHEM WHEN SEDER IS ON FRIDAY NIGHT? 

This year we will be celebrating our seder on Friday night.  Generally when one comes home from shule on Friday night, the first thing that we do as soon as we sit at our Shabbat table is sing “shalom aleichem.”  With these words we welcome special Shabbos angels that accompany us home from shule every Friday night. These angels bless us on seeing the Shabbos table prepared and the Shabbos candles lit.  When these angels accompany us home this year, on the Friday night of Pesach, they will no doubt be even more enthusiastic to bless us, when they witness all the preparation that has gone in to setting this magnificent Shabbos/Yomtov table.  They will feel as if they have never left home – heavenly.
If you are invited out and you do not hear your host welcoming these angels with the usual “shalom alecheim” song, don’t think your hosts are the devil incarnate… they are following a tradition of on the night of seder paying more attention to The Boss than his angelic messengers. Concerning Pesach night we read in the Haggadah, “and Hashem brought us forth from Egypt, not through an angel, nor through a seraf (fiery angel), nor through a messenger.”  Accordingly, we do not mention the angels on this night, only their Divine Employer. 
 
Apart from this, there is another reason that there is a custom not to recite “shalom aleichem” to the angels, when seder falls on Friday night.  This is out of consideration for our own little earthly cherubs – our children.  The Shulchan Aruch requires us to begin the seder with the kiddush immediately we get home, before the children fall asleep, as we want the children to be involved in as much of the seder as possible.  After all, this is what seder is all about.  It is not about making ourselves angelic by extending the seder until dawn.  This may have been alright for the angelic rabbinic personalities mentioned in our Haggadah who carried on until they had to be reminded that it was time for shacharis, but for lesser angelic beings such as ourselves, it may be a little too pretentious to outdo these great ancient rabbis in B’nei Brak!  The main mitzvah of seder is to tell our children of the event of the going out of Egypt as the Torah says, “vehigadata l’vincha” – “you will tell your children”.  Those who have adopted the custom of not saying “shalom aleichem” when seder falls on a Friday night, in order not to prolong the proceedings for the sake of the children, are also expressing by so doing that our heavenly messengers (the angels) are willing to forego their welcome in order to welcome G-d’s heavenly message!
(Shaalos Uteshuvas Rav Poalim chelek alef – Orach Chayim 472:1)

Weekly Torah Reflection  ........ 

Share your Ying as much as you do your Yang

As a rabbi I have had countless people coming into my office and sharing their woes with me.  Congregants have often said to me, “Rabbi, I am glad I shared this problem with you as you have helped take a big headache off my head!”…….. To which I answer, "you’re right, now I have got it – could you help get it off my head!”  Of course, helping people with their headaches is a rabbinic privilege – just call me Rabbi Panadol!  Mind you I am Rabbi Freilich (Rabbi Happy!) The only problem is that very rarely do people share their ‘ecstasy’ with me!  They will tell me about their children’s unfortunate choice of marriage partner or their children who have left home and refuse to speak to them. But when it comes to telling me the good news about the engagement of their son or daughter or that they have been blessed with a new grandchild, I often hear this third or fourth hand.  They will come up with some problem they have with the shule far quicker than praising the shule for any good it has done for them, if they mention this at all.

This leads me to an interesting thought on this week’s Torah reading.  When a person’s life is in danger and he is rescued, that person had to bring a korbon todah, a thanksgiving offering together with 40 loaves of bread in four different forms.  There was a time limit in which these were to be eaten. The Torah commentary Sforno states that the reason for the extremely short time limit was to guarantee that the person bringing the thanksgiving would have to share his good fortune with others as it would be impossible for him to eat so much bread in such a short time without making himself absolutely sick.  According to Sforno this thanksgiving offering was to be publicised as it was about good news. It portrayed the person's thanks to the Almighty for the joy that he or she had been blessed with.  Such joy should be shared with others. Yes!  There definitely is a need to share our anxieties, difficulties and problems with the rabbi, with  friends and those whom we love. But it is equally important, if not more so, to include them in the good news!  Not just the agony but also the ecstasy!
Good Shabbos!
Dovid Freilich

The Kiddush this week is kindly hosted by Luise and Leonard Duman in honour of Sam's Bar Mitzvah

Seudah Shlishit is kindly sponsored by Diana Berinson and David Berinson for the Yarzheit of Diana's late husband and David's late son, Daniel

The Seudah Shlishit is also kindly sponsored by Mrs Rivka Majteles in honour of the yarhzeit of her late husband Chaim Majteles