 1. Identify the limiting belief/fear and write it down.
We’ve already done this in our example, but sometimes this step can be tricky. We may not always be aware of our limiting beliefs and fears, and that’s when it helps to have a coach who can assist in uncovering/revealing hidden fears that might be holding us back.
2. Identify the feelings/thoughts associated with the limiting belief or fear and write them down.
Ask yourself, what are the thoughts or feelings that you think about when you imagine speaking in front of a group? You might feel nervous or sick to your stomach. You might think that you’re going to embarrass yourself. Or, maybe you’ll suddenly remember a similar scenario in the past that didn’t go so well. Then you start dwelling on these negative thoughts. In fact, your body can physiologically change for the worse. Write all of these thoughts and feelings down.
3. Create a trigger statement.
Think about a moment in your life that you’ve had success in this area. In our fear of public speaking example, the trigger statement might be, “A few years ago, I had this fear of speaking in front of this small group, but when I actually went and did it, it turned out to be much better than I could’ve ever imagined.”
A more difficult situation is when you’ve never had success in this particular area. Then you need to go to a different example in your life where you’ve had success overcoming another fear or limiting belief. For example, maybe a few years ago you were beginning a new position at work, and you just didn’t feel qualified. You felt too young, too inexperienced, but you took action and you ended up doing very well in that position. That would be your trigger statement. It might not be directly related to the specific fear you have now about public speaking, but you can still use the past success as the mental fuel needed to take action on your current dilemma.
4. Take action.
 What you have to do is hyper-focus on that trigger statement. Focus on the moment where you overcame that fear, where you were successful. When you’re in that moment, the next thing you have to do is take action immediately. In our example, you would take the steps necessary to prepare for your next speech, which can include researching for the content, practicing speaking with someone else or in front of a video camera, etc.
Everything is about getting to the point where you take action. Without action, nothing can be accomplished. When you start taking action, your mentality will start to change. The trigger statement gives you the spark necessary to do something, to get into the right mindset. Imagine this: you start preparing for the talk, you start practicing, and maybe you fumble a little bit, but then you get it down. You start feeling confident, and you have a group around you giving you feedback. Next thing you know, as a result of your actions, your feelings and thoughts begin to change. Now you’re thinking, “I can do this! I might not be amazing at this, but I’m gonna do the best I can. I’ll do a great job.”
And that’s how you turn your limiting belief into an empowering belief. Write this new belief down and tell it to yourself daily, until it just becomes second-nature to you. That’s the process. That will make a huge impact. Go ahead and do it. Do the best you can. Again, it’s like working out. It’s going to take time and practice. Keep at it!
Thanks,
Jared Polak
P.S. Want to learn more about mindset? Read my recent blog post on the topic here. |
