Returning to the Market Place

Snow still covers the forest floor surrounding Peaceful Dragon Home Temple as Spring buds swell on the Magnolia tree and warnings of bear cubs looking for food urges one to gather bird feeders in at dusk. 

In looking back over this past year of sabbatical from Zen teaching, I am aware of an incredible sense of gratitude rising up within my body.  

As I sit in this moment of writing, I recognize the privilege I have had in being able to take this time to reflect, review and re-evaluate what it means to be a Zen teacher, what is I want to bring forth in the Dharma and how to best serve. 

The sabbatical year has allowed me to participate in multicultural trainings and peer supervision through VISIONS, Inc. in Roxbury, MA with Dr. Valerie Batts, Dr. Felipe Garcia and Dr. Sarah Stearns. 

My growing awareness of the waters of unconscious cultural conditioning that I as a US born, white convert Buddhist woman swim in is deep and determined.  This training provides the tools, skills and knowledge to understand and impact the pervasive institutionalization of the dominance of white culture in the United States, and in particular in western convert Dharma communities.    

This past year has also given me the opportunity to be an assistant to the Somatic Experiencing� Training Institute in a three year clinical training near 

Newtown, Connecticut.  

Somatic Experiencing�, a trauma resolution method based in the body's innate wisdom, has proven personally powerful and effective in my working with other spiritual practitioners.  The benefit of immersing myself in such learning brings to life the liberation teachings of the Buddha. 

This sabbatical ends with having spent two months at Gampo Abbey in Nova Scotia, Canada where I attended Acharya Pema Chodron.  The heart opening focus of her teachings rooted in basic goodness has invigorated me and inspired a renewed approach to teaching Zen. 

I see Zen as just my real life, our life and the practice of being totally human.  In my body I experience the subtle constrictions, the twisting impulse to want it (whatever 'it' is) to be different, to strive forward, to bend the truth, to hide or run.  I have been opening up to what it is to just be me, to see, feel, be it all, plain and simple. Sometimes it has been hard to see the depth of my self-judgment.  This precious time of  introspection has gifted me with humility and an increased feeling of connection with others.  

I believe that being awake means seeing both the absolute nature of reality and the relational field of our differences.  Sharing with others, appreciating the differences, the entirety of this mutually arising phenomenal world rises and falls.   

Time fleeting, the ungraspable nature of the body aging, the raw reality of death--all bringing a strong reminder to fully live each moment.

 Gratitude to my teachers who have nourished my Dharma practice of complete acceptance and humility, to my students who have challenged me to really look at the meaning of what it is to teach Zen, to 

Ryumon Sensei, my life-long heart companion, who is truly my Dharma teacher of relationship.  And to those who have supported me through this year of sabbatical, to all of you I bow deeply 

with my entire being.  

I look forward to practicing with each of you this Spring.

Love, Anraku