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Inspiration, thoughts and recommendations from Mary Sue!
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Greetings!

This past weekend I attended a huge music festival. I go every year. And every year I run into people I see only occasionally. And every year I try hard to remember people's names.
 
The funny thing is that as the years go by I worry about this less and less – because all of my friends are having the same trouble. And we’re all wondering “Is this normal aging? Or am I losing my mind?”
 
Another frequent topic of discussion this weekend was our aging parents and family members. Over and over I heard from friends whose loved ones are living with some form of dementia. And over and over I heard heartwarming stories of how music has enriched the lives of all the family members and allowed them to connect in new ways. One woman who works in an assisted living home told me how she sings “When the Saints Go Marching In” to help one of the residents move through a difficult time of day. She told me, “No matter how upset this resident is, if I start singing that song she gets over it and starts smiling.” Music…pretty powerful stuff.
 
With all this in mind I am revisiting a topic and sharing a resource I’ve written about before. I wish you well and no, you’re not losing your mind.
 
Caring about you,
Mary Sue

Don't miss this month's highlights:
Is Your Brain Healthy?
 
Is your brain healthy? Sometimes I worry about mine when I can’t find my car keys; I forget someone’s name or I walk into a room and don’t know why I’m there. Can you relate?
 
But although I may be showing signs of normal aging, my brain is healthy. And I bet yours is too.
I may struggle to find a word for an object or a concept, but I can still describe what the object does or find other words to explain what I am trying to say. And that’s normal aging.
 
There are so many reasons why this is a good thing. And one of the most important reasons, for those of us who spend time with people with dementia, is that we are able to change.
 
People with dementia are doing the best they can with what they’ve got – a brain that isn’t healthy. They can’t change their brains and they can’t change what they are doing to make our jobs easier or their life better. It’s up to us. This may seem obvious, but in the throes of a challenging situation it can be hard to remember.
 
We must enter their reality and become good detectives. Behaviors are communication. And it’s up to us to figure out how to connect and support so that the needs of the person with dementia get met. It’s hard work.  Thankfully there are resources available to help all of us. One of the most valuable is Teepa Snow, Dementia Care Specialist.  Teepa’s mission is to “help families and professionals better understand how it feels to be living with dementia, and related challenges” and to provide training in her Positive Approach to Care so that families and professionals have real tools and strategies to make life better for everyone. If you work with or know someone living with dementia I urge you to take advantage of the resources you will find on her website. 

Teepa Snow’s “Positive Approach to Care (PAC) Philosophy"
encourages Care Partners to:
  • Respond to a person’s change in cognition and abilities in a way that is not hurtful or offensive
  • Understand that, with practice, common “reactions” to the person with dementia can become thoughtful “responses” that improve quality of life for everyone involved
  • Recognize that the person with dementia is “doing the best they can” and that if something isn’t working, it’s the responsibility of the Care Partner to change their approach and behaviors towards the person with dementia
  • Notice the environment surrounding a person with dementia and make changes as necessary
(Teepa Snow, Positive Approach to Care (PAC) Philosophy, Consultant Manual 2015)
Click here for a printable version of this newsletter!
Music Fun for Young and Old

If I Knew You Were Coming I'd Have Baked a Cake!
 
Here’s a simple song that seniors will know and kids can learn very easily. The words repeat and it’s fun to make up your own verses.
 
If I knew you were coming I’d have baked a cake, baked a cake, baked a cake.
If I knew you were coming I’d have baked a cake.
How d’ya do, how d’ya do, how d’ya do.
 
If I knew you were coming I’d have hired a band, hired a band, hired a band.
If I knew you were coming I’d have hired a band.
How d’ya do, how d’ya do, how d’ya do.
 
For Seniors ask “What would you do if you knew someone was coming over to your house?” Then use their suggestions in the song. Here are some examples.
If I knew you were coming I’d have…cleaned the house; mixed a drink; locked the door; combed my hair; mowed the lawn etc.
 
For children you might change the beginning to the following:
If I knew you were hungry I’d have bought some – have them fill in the blank with their favorite foods.
 
Here’s a link to the original version of the song. 
Rella’s Kentucky Oatmeal
Cake Recipe
Rella was my father in law Virgil’s cousin. She lived in Kentucky for all of her 105 years. This is a wonderful old time cake recipe that she shared with me many years ago.
 
Stir the ingredients below together until butter melts and then let it cool.
1 ¼ cup hot water
1 stick of butter
1 cup quick oats
1 cup white sugar
1 cup brown sugar
 
After it cools add 2 beaten eggs and 1 t vanilla to the mixture.
 
Mix together
1 1/3 cup flour
1 t  baking soda
½ t salt
½ t nutmeg
1 t cinnamon
 
Add this dry mixture to the wet ingredients and stir well.
Bake at 350 degrees. Batter will be thin and will bake quickly. Set the timer for 20 minutes and start checking it then. Bake until toothpick comes out dry.
 
While it is baking make the topping. Stir together:
1 ½ cups brown sugar
¼ cup evaporated milk
2 T melted butter
½ cup chopped pecans
½ cup coconut
 
Cover the cake while it is still hot with the topping. Return to the oven briefly until the topping turns into icing.
 
Here’s an alternate topping that is also yummy. Spread it over the hot cake, return to oven at once and turn oven up to 450 degrees until topping browns.
Stir together
¼ cup cream or half and half
½ cup melted butter
1 cup brown sugar
½ cup chopped pecans
½ cup coconut

Two Mothers Remembered
by Joann Snow Duncanson


I had two Mothers - two Mothers I claim
Two different people, yet with the same name.
Two separate women, diverse by design,
But I loved them both because they were mine.

The first was the Mother who carried me here,
Gave birth and nurtured and launched my career.
She was the one whose features I bear,
Complete with the facial expressions I wear.

She gave her love, which follows me yet,
Along with the examples in life she set.
As I got older, she somehow younger grew,
And we'd laugh as just Mothers and daughters do.

But then came the time that her mind clouded so,
And I sensed that the Mother I knew would soon go.
So quickly she changed and turned into the other,
A stranger who dressed in the clothes of my Mother.

Oh, she looked the same, at least at arm's length,
But now she was the child and I was her strength.
We'd come full circle, we women three,
My Mother the first, the second and me.

And if my own children should come to a day,
When a new Mother comes and the old goes away,
I'd ask of them nothing that I didn't do.
Love both of your Mothers as both loved you. 
The Walk to End Alzheimer’s
(Traverse City)

Saturday, September 19th
Registration at 9:00 am
Ceremony at 10:00 am
Walk starts at 10:30 am
Traverse City Civic Center

For more information and to donate online go to: http://act.alz.org/site/TR?fr_id=7561&pg=entry

Please consider joining me by donating. My donation this year goes to Ann Ballou, who will be walking in honor of her mother Polly who passed away recently. (Pictured above.) I sang with Polly twice a week for almost two years. 

TC Sings! And you can too!

The fall term for TC Sings is starting Wednesday September 23 and Thursday, September 24! Join founder and Director Heather Kingham for songs from all around the world, sung in three- and four-part harmony...all taught in the oral tradition. No need to read music; no previous musical experience necessary; no auditions. Every voice welcome...we sing for the joy and well-being we get from raising our voices in harmony with others. It's fun! Don’t worry if you miss the first session. You can join at any time. Visitors are always welcome and you can try it for one week with no obligation. Here’s the scoop.
When:
September 23 - January 31
High Noon Wednesdays (12 - 2 p.m.) and/or Evening Thursdays (7 - 9 p.m.) 
Where:
Grand Traverse Circuit
225 W 14th St., Traverse City 
What:
Community-building, spirit-lifting, joyful singing!
Big Sing bringing both groups together Sunday, January 31 
How:
Register online by printing/mailing our registration form...or bring the form to choir the first night. Registration forms also available at choir. New members are welcome anytime; fees are prorated, depending on when you start. $105 for 16 weeks...early bird discount ($10 off) for registrations by September 24! 
More details at tcsings.org.

More Musical Recommendations

The summer music festival season has ended but there are still three great family friendly music festivals in the Grand Traverse Region coming up this month. I’ll be performing at all three of these events so stop by and say hello!
Earthwork Harvest Gathering, September 18 – 20, near Lake City, MI
I’ll be performing at 10:45 am on Saturday with Tiyi Schippers and her family band Lake Effect.
http://www.earthworkharvestgathering.com/
Leelanau Uncaged, Saturday, September 26th in Northport, MI
I’ll be playing with my duo Drive South at 1:45 and 2:45.
http://www.leelanauuncaged.com/
Fountain Point Music Festival, Saturday evening and all day Sunday, September 26th and 27th, near Lake Leelanau
I’ll be leading a gospel sing along Sunday morning at 10:00 am and then playing with Drive South at 1:00.
http://www.fountainpointmusic.com/
Music for your little ones . . . 
“Songs You Know By Heart”: 18 favorite songs from the Young at Heart Music Program. Classics such as You Are My Sunshine, I Got Rhythm, Don't Sit Under the Apple Tree, My Wild Irish Rose, Let Me Call You Sweetheart and many more. Listen or sing along!

“Ms. Tiyi’s Garden”: Original and traditional songs and stories sure to please young children AND their parents. Action songs to move to, story songs to act out, silly songs to laugh with and Ms. Tiyi's original story and song with an important message "Sticks and stones may break your bones but words can break your heart." Appropriate for children 10 and under.

Click on CD image to redirect to the Young At Heart Music website store to make your purchase!
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Mary Sue Wilkinson is the founder of Singing Heart to HeartTM  and the Young at Heart Music Program. She is a career educator and professional musician. And she loves to sing! Her flagship program, Young at Heart Music, is devoted to bringing the joy of music and singing to seniors with decades of life experiences and memories tied to music. Mary Sue is available as a speaker sharing her expertise about the power of music to awaken memories and bring joy. Together with Tiyi Schippers, Mary Sue also provides music experiences for young children and trainingfor early childhood educators.
Contact Info:
www.youngatheartmusic.com
marysue@youngatheartmusic.com
Phone:  231.233.2948
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