Today's Dose of Smile-Therapy

Joke #1  (using what resources you have):
A man was watching a fisherman at work. The fisherman first caught a giant trout but threw it back in the river. Next the fisherman hooked a huge pike, and surprisingly tossed that one loose as well.

Finally, the fisherman caught a little bass. He smiled and put it in his bag. “Hey’ yelled the man who was watching.”Why did you throw back a giant trout and a huge pike, yet you chose to kepe a little bass?  The fisherman yelled back “Small frying pan.”
 
Joke #2
A Texan, anticipating an upcoming wedding, told his future son in law not to worry about purchasing a ring, as he wanted his daughter to have her great grandmother's diamond ring. However, before anything else, he wanted to have it appraised. So the Texan contacted a gemologist friend who agreed to determine the ring’s value. Instead of a fee she suggested  they lunch at one of San Antonio’s finer restaurants, as payment. 
 
A few days later, as the Texan and the gem expert sat sipping a glass of Merlot, he showed her the ring. She took out her jeweler’s loupe, examined the diamond and handed it back.

“Wow” said a  neighboring diner from Kansas, watching the entire scene play out. “These Texas women are tough!”