Dear Friends,
This week, I went from speaking to women in the utilities industry at Itron’s conference in Houston, to Orange County, where I talked to the women of Ellevate. We covered fulfillment, work/life, guilt and more. The last question yesterday was, “If you can leave this group with one piece of advice, what would it be?” And here is what I said, "Look at your goals and what you think you are capable of. Now set a goal that stretches that vision, one level beyond where you think you can go.”
Dream big, plan big!
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For Better Brainstorming, Tell an Embarrassing Story
- HBR
READ ARTICLE
Candor leads to greater creativity!
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Funny Girls
- The Harnisch Foundation
READ HERE
Boosting girls’ leadership through improv comedy.
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LEGO is Celebrating Female Scientists With A New ‘Women of NASA’ Set.
- Fortune
READ ARTICLE
Let’s direct our kids’ attention here and away from the anorexic lego girls.
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When the Revolution Came for Amy Cuddy
- NYT
READ ARTICLE
The take-down culture of science. And its victim.
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SAM'S CENTS
Non-negotiables
It pays to figure out what your nonnegotiables are. Once you do, you can set boundaries to protect them. Do you need to make sure nobody touches your Sundays? Do you need to be at every one of your daughter’s softball games or never miss a pediatrician appointment? Deciding on your nonnegotiables means reconciling what you want and what is practical, given your lifestyle.
Perhaps you really enjoy having family breakfasts every day but you are a teacher and need to be in the classroom too early to make that happen. Or you might want to be at every soccer game but realize that fall is your busy season at work and making it to 14 soccer games would jeopardize your results. There are some things you will need to give up. Whatever the case, setting a few clear, nonnegotiable boundaries between work and life is a key ingredient in your delicious pie.
Be realistic— but strong.
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Hi Sam,
I follow you on Facebook and you have gotten me through some of my hardest days as a working mom. I am a 29 year old married mother of three kids, ages 5, 3 and 5 months. I have been working in Real Estate for the last 3 years and I am very passionate and driven. Since going back to work after my last baby, I feel completely out of control in every aspect of my life. I have great help in terms of child care coverage. Family watches my two littles and I am off on Thursdays. However, as each relative comes to do my job as a mom everyday and I head off to work, I feel as though I am letting my children down. I don't think I can keep living this way but the money is great. I'm so afraid of the financial toll it will take on my husband and our family.
What should I do?
-Drowning in St. Louis
Dear Drowning in St. Louis,
First of all, this is not the time to make a big decision. The first five years of your children's lives are what I call “the maintenance years.” They are full of sleepless nights and manual labor. You will feel out of control with or without work. One thing you said struck me: “each relative comes to do my job as a mom everyday.” Whoaaaaaa. Your job as a mom is to love your kids and to care for them. When you go to work, you are still momming them by caring for them financially. You are a role model for your kids. There is a reason that daughters of working moms earn 23% more as adults than daughters of stay-at-home moms. Rather than quitting now, let’s find ways to steal more time for you and the kids. Let’s make sure you have one night out with your husband every week or two so that you can refuel your tank. Realize that you are in the messiest phase of life. It will get better and easier!
Love,
Sam
Have a problem? Ask Sam to solve it here.
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THE PRESS BOX
Last week, I was interviewed by Nada Jones on how to live a more fulfilling life. - Listen Here |
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