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During my last visit to Calgary, a lot of questions and doubts began coming to mind about my place and my future. It's like, once again, I was realizing the cost of my decision to move to Québec and work with YWAM living by faith. The choice has brought me down a different and somewhat less-relatable path, and at times this "sacrifice" seems hard to bear. Part of me wants to change paths to join something more normal that could bring more comfortable living and part of me wants to persevere. There's a story in the Bible of a man who sold all his belongings to buy a field in which he'd found a hidden treasure. My pastor happened to mention it on the last Sunday I was in town (thanks PB) and it stuck with me.
Although the attack on my mind seemed to stop when I arrived back in Montréal, I still want to receive fresh insight on why I'm doing what I do. What is this treasure and is it worth so much that I will pursue it above all else, even if it means continuing to step out of my comfort zone? I realise that I'm not the only person who has reflected on this question. If you have any insights or encouragements, I'd love to hear from you.
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Roadtrips
Two trips, over 45 hours in the car one-way, with exotic destinations like Indiana and Minnesota, and YWAM travel-mates.
In November I attended the "ENAG", Eastern North American Gathering, for YWAM along with 3 guys from YWAM Dunham. I attended a few sessions and mostly helped with the kids program run by the amazing Ellis family. My hope was to connect with other dancers, and God answered that wish as I met some girls from a dance DTS and also some talented youth during the kids program (see photo above). A highlight: getting a word of knowledge from the Lord and witnessing Him heal someone of their back pain. I have poor circulation in my hands, one hand was cold and the other was warm! A challenge: being confronted with the idea of talking to kids about God vs. allowing them to experience God.
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In December we attended David & Elise's wedding in Cambridge Minnesota. A treat to see the Boyum family again as well as Dale, the King's Kids founder, and meet some of Elise's lovely girl friends (including a lindy hopper :) ). Yes, my dress was the same colour as the bridesmaids but not on purpose.
We experienced God's grace during our travels. On the way back there was a big snowstorm coming up from the USA through to Ontario and Québec and we only encountered some poor conditions near Cornwall for about 30 minutes. Not to mention a quick passage through big cities like Toronto and Chicago traffic, as well as through customs. Thank you Lord!
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Family can be messy sometimes. It would be dishonest for me to say that two or three days after my arrival, I'm not wondering what I'm doing there. That being said, I wouldn't easily trade an opportunity to be with family and friends at Christmas-time. The benefits still outweigh the challenges.
After an extra three hour layover in Toronto I was happy to arrive in snowy Calgary and then collapse into bed. This visit had a good balance between visiting, adventures and down-time. We had two Christmas dinners, one with just my parents and myself on Christmas day, and the other with my siblings and their spouses a few days later. I watched the old Anne of Green Gables videos with my parents, learned a new dice game from my brother & his wife and hung out with my old home group at New Years. I appreciated re-connecting with friends, savouring some tasty Christmas traditions (cookie dough, stuffing, home-made egg-nog), and enjoying some time outdoors. My last weekend was quite intense: a visit to the cousins and swing dancing on Friday (for the first time in two years, yay!), a cross-country ski over 15+ kms on Saturday, watching Star Wars at the movie theatre, church on Sunday morning, lunch out with friends and a family dinner before an early morning flight back to Montreal. Yes it was worthwhile, and yes, I did some sleeping on the plane :P
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The kids living in Arthur Normand are the tough sort, they are full of energy and courage despite the winter cold. When they got the day off school due to bad weather, it didn't dampen their enthusiasm. As Camille & I visited the kids to inform them that we wouldn't run games that afternoon, I was met by such motivation that it made me change my mind. That time we had most of the regular and occasional participants in attendance, what fun!
Before Christmas we organised a cookie-making workshop & story-time at my teammates house. The kids loved cutting out their own batch of cookies, decorating them with (way too many) sprinkles and of course, bringing some home. We had on our hearts that specific kids would be able to attend, and we saw how those kids were at home when we came to pick them up and how their parents let them come.
We felt the Lord leading us to pray regularly in the neighbourhood this fall, so we've been going one morning/week in rain, snow or sun.
Our reflection continues as to creating a small group for the kids who are interested in having a deeper discussion about God and faith. The current challenge remains not having an indoor facility close-by and discerning who will carry this vision forward. We also have several pre-teen girls with whom we'd like to connect more on a relational level while they are still open to the idea. Please pray that God will continue to bring these reflections to maturity and give us wisdom.
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Piles of cookies to bring home :)
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Camille and I commissioned a friend to make us some art for our living room and the above painting is the result. It represents not only freedom of movement using our physical bodies but also dancing in our spirits. I think many can relate to feeling more free to express ourselves in our spirits than externally.
In December I volunteered for the Nutcracker ballet presented as a collaboration between dancers from the Lanaudière region and Ballet Ouest from Montreal. A privilege to get a behind the scenes view at the effort put into the show, to watch some professionals up close and to witness the enthusiasm of local dancers to participate. For me it was 2.5 full days with about 70 kids & youth to supervise, check costumes, etc. and for the kids it represented many more hours.
I was asked to dance during our Christmas celebration at church, finishing off the year's theme of freedom. A bit nerve-wracking when I was getting used to dancing on the side and now it was "official" and up-front. With all the other events happening in December I only choreographed 2 minutes of the dance and ended up dancing the full song (4 minutes). Another out of comfort zone moment. Camille took a video if you want to take a peak.
In January I ended up teaching more than usual because my good friend was on sick leave. I substituted for her ballet classes with the dance program at the private high school in St Jacques and one other class on Thursday nights, the night I already teach. A good opportunity to share my knowledge and love for this dance form, and at the same time a challenge as I dealt with attitude from some of the students.
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