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This year, I found myself reflecting on my life more than ever. Particularly to a time when I was heavily dependent on medication to deal with stress and anxiety.
I used to be up and down a lot with heavy mood swings. Whilst my good days were good, my bad days took a heavy toll. I was losing sleep, having panic attacks in the middle of the night, lost my appetite, became so paranoid about my peers and lost a general sense of interest.
But each morning and night, like clockwork, I took the anti-depressants.
It wasn’t until I came to Canada in 2016 where I met with a family doctor where he informed me that I was misdiagnosed in Ireland. He (doctor) was so shocked when I told him the medication I was taking.
Then together we set a goal – to eventually live a life medication free.
I was insured and had extended benefits since I started working in Canada. This opened up a lot of avenues for seeking further assistance with my ongoing battle. My benefits allowed me to enroll in a program where I was able to work with a counselor.
We spent several sessions together going through each issue whether big or small. After several sessions and making more progress than ever, my doctor informed me that he would lower dosage for a short period of time to “wean” me off the medication and avoid going “cold-turkey”.
At first, this was so difficult as I kept thinking that it would never work and I would be stuck on this for the rest of my life. But I was stubborn. I didn’t want to cave and after 6 months of 1⁄2 dosages on safer prescribed medication, I felt a change.
Before meeting my doctor, I was playing only Gaelic Football but then I started playing camogie and co-ed soccer. For the first time in years I had the energy, confidence, and more importantly, the interest in meeting more and new people, play a new sport.
After a successful 6 months on 1.5 dosages, my Doctor and I agreed to go “cold turkey” for 3 months.
I was feeling like a brand new person on a lower dosage, I was confident to take it on and fight for my mental health and battle against my demons all by myself. And to date, this is probably my biggest achievement.
I would highly recommend to anyone in similar situations to look at the options that are available to us in BC and take the first step. There is no stigma attached and there is nothing wrong with taking prescribed medicines to help with anxiety and depression but my story proves that even though you may be heavily depended on medicines doesn’t mean you will be forever
I am proud to say that I am medication free for 2.5 years.
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