Happy September!

Okay, technically it's October...but barely! It's been a while since my last letter, and in that time I've gotten married and set off on a year-long (maybe??) backpacking trip.

So far, travel has been far more than I expected. I wanted to see some cool places, get out of my comfort zone, and meet some interesting people. I didn't expect my whole world-view to shift so widely, rapidly, and constantly.

I have no idea how to sum up everything that's happened in the past two months, but I'll attempt to capture the highlights. 💕

First, some book related news! These past eight weeks have given me work-life balance whiplash. So much of my life for the last two years has been consumed with this book, but now it's finished, and my personal life is so full and fulfilling that I've often forgotten I still have a book coming out. 

But I got awesome news this week! 

One of the trade reviewers, Kirkus Magazine, just gave When You Trap a Tiger a starred review.

They said some wonderful things, including that the plot is "simple yet suspenseful"--which, ahhh! Huzzah! If you've been following these newsletters, you know the book has caused me more than a bit of angst. And the plot was one of the hardest parts. I wasn't sure I could weave together folktales, history, and a modern family story in a way that made sense, so this review means so much to me. I know this book won't be for everyone, but it's a huge relief to know that at least someone gets it! 

The review also said that the book is "at one and the same time completely American and thoroughly informed by Korean culture." This was always one of my biggest goals, and it's surreal to see those words in a review. 🐯

Okay, speaking of that full-to-the-brim personal life: I got married! Josh and I had a private ceremony in Hawaii, followed by a community celebration in Philadelphia.

The Hawaii wedding was the most important day of my life. I sat by the ocean that morning, writing my vows with shaking hands. A few hours later, we exchanged those vows on my favorite beach in Hawaii—my favorite place in the world. 

Two weeks after, we celebrated in Philadelphia with everyone we love. We blended and adapted Korean, Jewish, and Hawaiian traditions to fit us and our values. We broke glass, exchanged leis, ate Korean food, and led all of our guests—of all religions and backgrounds—in a Hebrew prayer. (My Hebrew accent is truly terrible, but it meant so much to me to participate in the motzi.) 

I feel so grateful for Josh, and for the incredible people in our lives. These days were filled with so much love. 💕

And as for travel...

As I write this, I'm sitting in the Shanghai airport, waiting to fly to Cambodia. Josh is standing in long line to check in to our budget flight, and the line is notably not moving, and I'm using this newsletter as an excuse to sit in the waiting area while he does the hard part. Ah, marriage. It's working out so far. :)

We didn't plan to go to China. We had our route fairly meticulously scheduled (casual backpackers we are not; we are both too Type A)—and we were set to go straight from Malaysia to Cambodia. 

But my dad is friends with a young couple in Hangzhou, and when they offered to show us around for a few days, we readjusted our itinerary and booked our flights. Maybe we're learning to be spontaneous, just a little. 

As it turns out, these friends are two of the funniest, most generous humans, and while the sights in China were incredible*, the best part of the trip was getting to know them. 

Though they speak a fair amount of English, they haven't been studying it for very long, and Josh and I can't speak any Chinese beyond "ni hao" and "xie xie." So we expected to pantomime our way through the trip. We figured we'd manage basic small talk about siblings and favorite foods—the first date kind of chit-chat—but nothing beyond that. 

By our third day, though, Josh and I were sharing our thoughts on our president, our friends discussed their feelings about the one-child rule (now up to two), and at one point, Josh explained the American justice system and it's systematic racism so clearly and effectively that I fell a little more in love with him. 

Yes, it was a challenge to communicate with a limited vocabulary, but incredibly rewarding, too. 

Being able to communicate in basic language without sacrificing nuance is something I try to apply to my writing--it's a major element in writing for children--but I've never had to apply it in speech like that. 

I don't think I'm a great conversationalist. I'm better when I have time to sit with words, to think them through before committing. In speech, I tend to trail off, to end my sentences with lazy ellipses, trusting that whomever I'm talking to will to fill in the blanks. 

But in China, I had to really consider what I was saying. And here, speaking slowly wasn't a hinderance. It was a necessity. These conversations forced us all to slow down, to choose our words thoughtfully. And that's something we don't always do enough when discussing serious, personal, and potentially controversial topics. When language is so accessible, it's easy to be careless. 

So I'm carrying this lesson forward. And I'm thankful to China and to our friends, for reminding me not to take conversation for granted, and for showing me what is possible when we really commit to communicating. 

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*If you're planning a trip to Hangzhou or Shanghai, add Thousand Islands Lake to your itinerary. Besides being stunningly gorgeous, it has a fascinating history. A city under the sea always captures the imagination.  

Thanks for reading! If you've traveled around Southeast Asia before, let me know! I'd love to hear your stories and travel advice. Or, if you're planning a trip of your own, send me an email if you want to know our favorite things we've done.

Have a happy October!

💙,
Tae