Okay, so let’s address the elephant with fangs in the room. Last month’s newsletter was taken over, and for those of you who read it, it was clear who was driving that bus. Apologies have been made and accepted, although the former was mostly tongue-in-cheek, and the latter, though sincere, was with rolled eyes. But that’s kind of the way things go around here, as you are well aware.
But it got me thinking. They want it so bad? They can take it! I love doing my missives, but in the future, there are going to be some guest hosts. It’s a good idea. Different perspectives are always better than just one, and L.W. is teething so it’s not like I don’t have other things to worry about lolol.
With that bit of business out of the way, let’s talk about October! Yes, it is the season of Halloween, and yes, the Brothers have a lot of bright ideas about going into human neighborhoods and scaring the crap out of people. This is a threat brought out every year along with the pumpkins and the inflatable ghosts. They never do it, though, and I am heartened by this track record as I picture all manner of innocent little kids trying to understand how something that weighs three hundred pounds and has a gleaming set of canines disappears into thin air right in front of them- or makes a sudden appearance. The truth is, although there is not a lot of love lost between the Brothers and humans- as someone who’s half human myself, I still like homo sapiens a lot, but there’s a ton of history between the species that I did not have to live through, so I get their reserve- they wouldn’t go out of their way to hurt anyone, and more to the point, they do not want to bring any notice to themselves. So the running after Trick or Treaters with their hands all clawed up and their fangs flashing is just a pipe dream they joke around a lot about, and I’m good with this!
We ARE going to celebrate Halloween night at the mansion, however! We’re going to pretend that everyone’s bedrooms are houses, and each of the Brothers, the fighters, and the others, including all doggen!, will have bowls of their favorite candy to offer the little ones. The kids are going to make the rounds, starting with the Pit, and then going throughout the big house. I’m really excited. I bought a little red wagon for L.W., and when he gets tired, if he gets tired, I am going to roll him along. Although... even as I say that, it’s more likely we’ll use the wagon for his candy load. Everyone adores that little kid. His uncles are liable to spoil him as usual!
As for costumes? I’m going to panda him. I figure soon enough, I will not get a vote, and the idea of him toddling along, holding my hand, in a plush panda suit? How cute is that going to be? I’m going to be a ghost under a sheet. I have always wanted to be like Geena Davis in Beetlejuice, walking around draped in white, with eye holes cut out lolol I am so lame! Bitty is going to come as a butterfly queen. This involves a diaphanous dress with all the colors of the rainbow, a set of fairy wings, and a mask on a stick with a scatter of butterflies coming off where the eyebrows are. Lyric and Rhamp are going as fuzzy dice lolol! You know what I’m talking about, right? The ones that hang from rear view windows? Lyric is going to be pink, and Rhamp is in black, and before Layla is slapped with the traditional sex roles stereotype, we put a bunch of fabric samples down on the floor, and they both went for those. Nothing we could do. The household’s seamstress made the blocky, stuffed costumes, and they are a stitch!
Are the Brothers dressing up? Well, you know the answer already to some of those. Zsadist? Absolutely not. V? Over his cold, dead body, apparently. Tohr is willing to wear a mask, although I suspect it is of the non-whacky variety, but hey, he’s in! And Autumn is trying to pick her favorite Disney princess (I think Jasmine is going to win.) Wrath is going as a zoo keeper with a pith helmet- think Steve Irwin only not with a blond wig. George is going to be his lion- and strangely, George doesn’t seem to mind the costume! Blay and Qhuinn are planning to be the Blues Brothers, and Layla and Xcor are doing the Beauty and the Beast routine. Lassiter? David Lee Roth. As if he could be anything else? Rhage is going as Aquaman, Jason Mamoa style, and Mary is going to be a Tootsie Pop (white slacks with a big, stuffed ball of red fabric with white details on it.) Phury and Cormia are going to be the two old folks from that painting, American Gothic, and Butch and Marissa are going as Gianni Versace and Elizabeth Hurley in that black dress with the gold safety pins? John Matthew and Xhex are going to be Neo and Trinity. The Band of Bastards are dragging their feet, so I’m not sure where they’re going to come out on the decision, and Fritz and the doggen are going dress up as their favorite Krispy Kreme donuts. Ruhn and Sax are thinking it’s the Bounty paper towel man and the Great Gatsby, but I believe they are still considering their options.
Anywhoodle, I’m sure I’ve forgotten a couple of people. And I’d be lying if I didn’t say I wasn’t ridiculously happy at the idea of everyone coming together- oh! My costume! I forgot! I’m going as Eleven from Stranger Things! She’s my hero...
I hope everyone has a safe and happy Halloween night, and yes, I will report in at the beginning of the November newsletter as to how everything went down!
Sending all our love to you and yours,
Beth
To celebrate the Halloween season, this month is all about the Trick or Treat candy! Read on to discover what you are in the bowl- and know that everything is perfect. Whether candy bar or taffy, candied apple or toothbrush, there is room for everybody! No nickels or dimes, though. We are better than that. And, actually, no toothbrushes, either. And no organic, handmade bullcrap. Also no raisins, sugar free gum, or popcorn. If it can’t rot your teeth, pull out your fillings and make you go buzz, we’re not interested.
It’s important to have standards!
Love you! xxx Your Favorite Fallen Angel**
Aries (March 21-April 19)
As the start of all things, we must give you the gold standard, the OG master, the Mack daddy: Snickers. You are not only sweet and crunchy goodness from the caramel and the peanuts, you are able to cure the hangries! There’s a whole commercial series around your power to turn the crank around with your combination of sugar, caffeine and protein. You are awesome!
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
You are the steady eddy, an unsung hero who is always there. You are the Milky Way, less flamboyant than your Snickers counterpart, quieter, more subtle, but you are sooooo good. You are my favorite candy bar, whether in dark chocolate or regular!
Gemini (May 21- June 20)
With your two sides, there is only one candy you can be. You are Sour Patch Kids! Starting out sour, you show your true colors when you turn sweet, and there are so many variations on the theme. Whether it’s strawberry or orange, pear or blue raspberry, you never fail to get our attention and then remind us why sweets are so good!
Cancer (June 21- July 22)
You are another true classic, a candy so perfect, so sublime, there is no need to add anything to it. You are the original Hershey’s chocolate bar, without almonds, because you need nothing more than your loyal self to satisfy even the pickiest of Halloweeners. You are good from the freezer or at room temperature, a true gem that has stood the test of time for generations!
Leo (July 23-August 22)
Gimme a break! Gimme a break! Break me off a piece of that Fancy Feast! (Office ref, had to!) You are KitKats, Leo, a source of fun and the leader of any good time. You are delicious at any hour of the day or night, capable of perking up even the dimmest nod, a combination of crunch and chocolate that is one of my favorites!
Virgo (August 23- September 22)
There is only one candy you could be, Virgo. With your affection for order and discipline, you are M&Ms. With your candy coated shell, you make sure there is no melting in the hand, only in the mouth, and OMG you are amazing. Portable, practical, but oh, so good, you are perfect for any occasion whether it’s the movie theater, out on the town, or on the couch during a binge watch!
Libra (September 23- October 22)
Libra, you are a connection person who values your relationships and a good equilibrium. You are Twizzlers! Shareable, careable, making smiles wherever you go, everyone likes you and why wouldn’t they? I mean, hello, who doesn’t like Twizzlers!
Scorpio (October 23- November 21)
You are a strong, clear character, and when I think of you, I think of Reese’s peanut butter cups. Declarative chocolate and peanut butter fabulousness, you make no bones about anything! At the end of the day, there is no better balance than that peanut'y center covered with its chocolate blanket, and its not unlike you- softer on the inside than you’d guess by the outside!
Sagittarius (November 22- December 21)
Twix is sharable! There are two in every pack, and with your social justice commitment and your sense of right and wrong, you are definitely Twix. Plus, hello, caramel and cookie draped in chocolate? How can you keep that to yourself! You have to spread the wealth. Bonus: gold packaging and you know how much I love gold!
Capricorn (December 22- January 19)
You value home and family, and that makes me think of candy corn, a staple that is synonymous with this holiday! Cheerful bowls of yellow, orange and white wedges are perfect for this season, and the taste goes with everything because, at the end of the day, it’s just colored sugar with a chew that is oh, so, satisfying!
Aquarius (January 20- February 18)
Starbursts are chewy and fruity with an assortment in every bag! You’re a rebel, Aquarius, so you could never just be one thing and one thing only. Strawberry? Or maybe it’s orange. Lemon? Or maybe its cherry! Brightly colored wrappers complete the fun and the sparkle that is you!
Pisces (February 19- March 20)
Adventure awaits! You are Jelly Bellys! With a countless number of flavors to choose from, a universe of possibility awaits in every bag. You are this freedom and discovery, and you work in all seasons, whether it’s Halloween, Easter, birthday or 4th of July. Tart and sassy or more mellow, you always hit the right note!
**Although really, how many of us do you know? And PS, this is just for sh*ts and giggles, entertainment, blah, blah, blah.
Dear Vishous,
I’m really glad you’ve opened this up to things other than romantic issues. My husband and I moved into the home of our dreams four months ago. It’s not a huge mansion or anything, but for us, it’s perfect, especially as we think about starting a family. We saved up for five years to make the down payment, and it needed some work which we happily did, but probably couldn’t really afford right now.
The problem is our neighbor to our left. There is a row of beautiful holly trees that grow down our joint property line and provide a natural barrier between us and him. We love these trees and nurture them- and they are planted on our side of the line. Our neighbor, however, seems to feel they are his to do with what he pleases. Without our permission or knowledge, he cut them back so aggressively that their health has been compromised. At least two of the twelve seem to be dying now.
This neighbor has not been welcoming from the beginning. He never says hello. He’s never tried to get to know us. He’s not friendly when we pass cars. I’ve spoken to our neighbors on the other side, and I gather he’s like this with everybody. I wish I could go over there, with my husband, and talk this out with him. Explain to him about the trees and come to some kind of compromise that doesn’t involve him taking a hacksaw to them while we’re at work. But he refuses to answer his door.
I’d be grateful for some direction from you about how to handle this. I am worried- like, what else he will do? Park a bunch of boats and RVs in his driveway? Start a garage band? What if this gets worse? We can’t afford to move, especially after we put all the work into this house, plus we honest like where we are except for him.
Sincerely,
Tree’d Off
***********************************
Mary: Tree’d off, I’m so sorry about those trees. I know you must be heartbroken, but also worried about your privacy and the peaceful enjoyment of your property.
Vishous: You need to get a flamethrower.
Mary: *blinks* V, did you read the letter? The trees are on her property. She likes them.
V: Flamethrower’s not for the hollies. It’s for the neighbor-
Mary: Vishous. Homicide is not the answer.
V: Yeah, see, I beg to differ. Light the arboreal-bastard on fire and then use the ashes as fertilizer. They’ll help with the Ph balance of the soil.
Mary: *shaking head* This is absolutely NOT the solution-
V: Well, if he won’t open his door, how else can they resolve this?
Mary: Tree’d off was not clear how many times she and her husband tried to reach out. Maybe he wasn’t home. Perhaps he was busy. They need to try again, and then write a letter to him to summarize the conversation. Or, hey, if there is a homeowner’s association in the neighborhood, ask them for help and advice. Flamethrowers are not the way to handle this.
V: Fine. How about tree trimmer. Eye for an eye. Take his arm and part of a leg. *wipes hands* Sorted.
Mary: No! That is a crime-
V: It’s what he did to the tree. That is not on his property line. Karma’s a b*tch.
Mary: That is not karma. Bodily harm is a crime.
V: Whatever. Listen, they don’t have to be friends with the guy. Tree’d off is wrong if she thinks just because she moved into the house next door that everyone’s got to be palsy, palsy. People are not obligated to get along. They are, however, obligated to stay in their lane, and not hack somebody else’s tree to death.
Mary: Okay, I will agree with you on that one point at least. Abutting properties does not make for automatic friendships, but for the common good, people do have to get along. I truly believe another attempt at discussing the situation face to face should be made (provided Tree’d Off and her husband feel physically safe to do so.) And then, if things persist or escalate further, you may have to look into legal remedies. I don’t know what state you’re in, or what the law says about things like this, but if he did kill your trees in an impermissible manner, then he needs to make that right.
V: Fine. Go try to talk to the guy. But if he blows you off, or if he tries a bunch of head game bullsh*t, I advocate for the more face-to-face solution. This can involve frying pans, grenades, crowbars. Hell, park your car in his living room some night. Seems fair, given that he’s not respecting your property lines.
Mary: Please do NOT resort to violence. That is not the way to resolve this.
V: Please DO resort to violence. Sometimes, you just need to cut through the crap and make things happen. Plus, I like me a good holly tree.
Mary: I didn’t know you were so into horticulture?
V: I’m not. But I really don’t like douchebags.
Mary: *rubs her head* Tree’d Off, please let us know how this goes as you seek a peaceful resolution.
V: Always remember, Home Depot has an array of power tools. I think you’re going to need them. Also shovels. To bury the body. Until next month, take care- of business.
Big surprise, Halloween is my second favorite human holiday. Hello, candy and scaring humans- plus horror films everywhere! What could be better, other than pin-the-tail-on-the-angel?
Naturally, in honor of this most festive season, I had to rock the OG classic, Halloween for this month’s column. This movie came out October 25, 1978, and for its time, it was kind of like The Blair Witch Project. It was shot on a shoe-string budget for around $300k in the spring of ‘78, and it grossed over $70 million, making it a wildly successful independent film. Also, I didn’t know this, but John Carpenter did the cool syntho soundtrack in addition to the directing.
This movie led to a franchise of other feature films and remakes (11, I believe?) and also novels, videogame(s) and comic books. There’s even another contemporary film with a reprise of the original cast coming (Halloween Kills.) This original standard is widely credited with reviving the horror genre in the eighties, leading the way for a whole host of slasher films and franchises, including Friday the 13th and A Nightmare on Elm Street.
Anywho, please join me for a stroll down memory lane, to Haddonfield, Illinois, and let’s get behind the mask and enjoy!
:40 Okay that piano music. Come ON. Classic. And you know, now these credits remind me of Stranger Things, weird how things come around, huh. 1:36 Real Housewives of BH ref with Kyle Richards, and we can give a shout out to the old school carving of the pumpkin? 2:06 Kool Lusby- great name 2:54 Love the wobbly Killer Cam 3:27 Obligatory teenager necking scene 4:34 Knife time, and the green sleeve tells us that this is not our ordinary killer 5:15 Blond kid gets what he wants and takes off. What a dog. How about some cuddle time, you know? 5:55 Mask up 6:21 Love the eye holes. And something tells me Mike is forfeiting his allowance this week 7:16 Great set up. I mean, this is the reason this movie is a classic! 7:34 It was a dark and stormy night.... on October 30, 1978. 8:08 I love Dr. Loomis!!!!
10:16 You probably should go up to the hospital, Dr. Loomis. 10:30 Oh, shiiiiiiiiiiiit we have a car mounting 11:39 Ahhh, the suburbs. So peaceful. So... neva gonna be the same again 12:17 Back in the days when kids carried books, not laptops... and walked twelve miles through the snow to school. Love the wool tights, btw. Do they even sell those anymore? 13:34 Love the synthesizer background music 13:52 Oh, snap. The Meyers’ house. 14:17 Okay, I didn’t just jump right now. Really. I totally did not. 14:41 Mask breather 15:16 That’s right Dr. Loomis, get out ya can o’ whoop ass. But you parked in a handicapped spot so let’s not get too judgey 16:27 Man, if I saw that standing outside of my school... 17:25 F*cking bullies. Hate ‘em 17:50 Mikie! Get that kid- he’s a bully! *pauses* *orders a pumpkin spice latte from Fritz* *resumes* 18:43 Okay, see all these camera angles and the breathing? I am trying to explain to my Mary that this is true cinema verite. I don’t think she’s buying it. 20:09 Ahhhh so that’s where Mike got the blue clothes. They’re from the garage- and PS, you missed the dead body there, Dr. Loomis. 20:46 Three new cheers! Hairdressers! Dance! Linda, how can you handle the stress? 21:36 Back in the good ol’ days when the bad kids threw eggs 22:39 I think Lori is right about Annie. Annie is going to get people in trouble- and she’s kind of a pill 23:49 FYI, Butch approves of Linda’s wedges 25:04 Annie, stop harshing on our girl, there’s nothing wrong with saving your money and staying home 27:13 At this point, if I were Lori, I’d be freaking the f out 28:44 Check out the bell bottoms! And the block color coat lol 30:00 Did they coordinate the car interior with Annie’s plaid shirt? 33:00 Annie, you’ve got the disapproving teenager act down pat. I’m looking forward to your Michael Meyers moment 33:48 Loomis! Behind you! 34:18 At this point, I’m feeling like this is a toxic relationship for Lori. Annie is always putting her down. Lori, you need to find new friends- although Mike is going to help you with this 35:12 What’s with the drainage thing running down the middle of the street? Weird 36:50 Soooo... this is the sheriff’s car? I’m not clear on this *rolls eyes* *thanks Fritz for latte* *opens fresh bag of candy corn*
37:46 I don’t want to know what that is on the floor. And man, this house needs a wet-vac 38:17 That’s a penlight not a flashlight. Tiny beam 38:44 So we know Loomis has a gun 39:11 “Yes, sheriff, I am p*ssing in my pants.” 39:59 Sherriff: “What do we do.”
Loomis: “Let’s blow town and go to Disneyland.” 40:50 Ohhhh contraband comics, the best kind 41:21 Okay, the dog knows. Annie, listen to the dog 42:40 Okay, the kid knows. Lori, listen to the kid 43:11 Mask breathing. 44:03 Annie, you’re getting on my nerves. 44:29 I cannot support the killing of any animal, especially not a beautiful German shepherd like that. I know it’s pretend, but this hurts my heart. Humans, I could give two sh*ts about, but a lovely sweet doggo who is trying to protect even Annie who is a total waste of space? It almost makes me want to never watch this again 46:06 I would totally let Lori babysit Bitty. Not that my Bits needs that 46:26 Look at this way. Next to those washers? Easy to clean all that blood off- hey! Tide plug. 46:59 Nope. It ain’t one of Paul’s cheap tricks- and I’m sorry, Annie, do you think you could put a little more soap powder in there? I don’t think half the jumbo box is enough 48:19 “Paul, Annie is busy getting killed now. She can’t come to the phone.” 49:40 I swear to God, if one more phone rings in this movie I’m going to throw my pumpkin spice at the screen 52:46 I hear Kyle Richards is coming back as Lindsay Wallace for Halloween Kills-I am so on for that movie 52:53 “I’m just going to walk around in my white shirt and this plaid blanket with my mustard colored knee socks on.” *finished candy corn* *opens bag of fun sized Snickers- wonders if there is an un-fun size?* 54:00 Condensation on the windows- door now unlocked- 54:42 That car horn must have gotten someone’s attention? 57:31 Oh, Dr. Loomis, throwing voices. You’re a cut up. 58:10 Dr. Loomis: “Looking at the wall, not seeing the wall, staring...” -what I wish I could do whenever Lassiter opens his pie hole 58:54 Okay, so fine, this is not exactly Oscar-worthy dialogue 59:06 Check out the rad van! 1:00:04 “It’s totally dark!” No, sh*t, Linda. 1:00:34 Fornicating teenagers. Time for more body bags. 1:02:55 Enough with the f*cking phone ringing! And who has sex next to a carved pumpkin-oh, good, idea! Take the receiver off the hook! 1:03:59 Bob, no offense, but you have no stamina. And Linda, your standards are too low. That sh*t lasted a minute and a half. 1:04:35 “I’ll be right back. Don’t get dressed.” Bob, this is not going to be a problem. Trust me. It’s also not something you’re going to worry about in 3, 2... 1:005:47 Bingo. 1:06:32 Mike: “Huh. How m’I gonna get my knife back and still keep this shlub off the floor?” 1:06:49 Can I tell you how much I love the fact that he put the glasses on over the sheet? 1:07:59 At this point, I want to strangle someone with a phone cord too from all the ringing in this movie. 1:08:41 “I’ll kill you if this is a joke.” No, it isn’t Lori, and you’re a little late for the killing part... 1:10:03 “Oh, you know, it’s just me and this bush.” -Dr. Loomis 1:11:09 Check out the knitting. And is everything brown and gold? Oh, wait. It’s 1978... Just so you know, the gray everyone is painting everything right now is the harvest gold and avocado green of this decade. 1:14:07 Things about to get real real, Lori... 1:14:44 “You’ll be sorry.” Lori, they already are, sweetie. 1:15:14 There are only about fifteen minutes left in the movie. We are coming to our dark moment. *finishes bag of mini Snickers* *opens bag of M&M, plain, not peanut* 1:16:16 Oh, I get it. At first I was like, WTF, Mike made a gravestone? But nope, he pulled it from the cemetery 1:16:45 And now we are in the Find-the-body stage of things. 1:17:01 Lori, you need to move. Like RIGHT NOW 1:17:32 Doors never work in horror movies. Like... never. Whether you want them open or keep them closed, they do not work for you. 1:18:15 Question: who has a lock on the inside of their kitchen? 1:18:32 Okay, so someone would have heard her scream. This is suburbia. This is the one part of the movie I have a problem with (other than the German shepherd.) There is no way there wouldn’t be trick ‘r treaters around. 1:19:17 Oh, Lori, you’re after your keys? I wouldn’t have guessed. I thought you were looking for Certs. Fresh breath is important, esp. with a killer who likes to work close. 1:19:54 Tommy, you gotta boogie. Come on, son, open the f*cking DOOR! 1:20:19 Lori, close the f*cking door! 1:20:42 “Knit, two, pearl, one- stab my brother in the neck.” 1:21:08 Lori! I know this is early days for the horror genre, but the killers never die at this stage of the movie. Keep that knife, go up and get the kids, and run the f*ck away! 1:22:20 Okay, Lori’s back in charge. Up on her feet. 1:22:54 “There’s nothing to be scared of.” -Lori to the kids Wellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll... 1:23:25 Is anyone else thinking of The Shinning here? Closet time, except roles reversed. And I’m sorry, but Michael would be able to bust that sh*t totally open- oh, he takes my advice. By the way, I’m not going to lie, the first time I saw this, I was scared sh*tless. 1:24:37 Right in the eyeball. 1:26:05 Annnnnd we’re up again. 1:27:05 Mask on, mask off, mask on, the clapper... 1:28:10 He’s gone!!! 1:28:56 Love the way this ends with the breathing- so open ended!
Ahhhh, this was just awesome! I think I’m going to watch Part II now. I actually prefer II to I, but I thought it was important to do them in order.
Have a very Happy Halloween! Until next month, watch well and eat more!
Click below to listen to an exclusive audio excerpt of BLOOD TRUTH!
Okay, so let’s address the elephant with fangs in the room. Last month’s newsletter was taken over, and for those of you who read it, it was clear who was driving that bus. Apologies have been made and accepted, although the former was mostly tongue-in-cheek, and the latter, though sincere, was with rolled eyes. But that’s kind of the way things go around here, as you are well aware.
We ARE going to celebrate Halloween night at the mansion, however! We’re going to pretend that everyone’s bedrooms are houses, and each of the Brothers, the fighters, and the others, including all doggen!, will have bowls of their favorite candy to offer the little ones. The kids are going to make the rounds, starting with the Pit, and then going throughout the big house. I’m really excited. I bought a little red wagon for L.W., and when he gets tired, if he gets tired, I am going to roll him along. Although... even as I say that, it’s more likely we’ll use the wagon for his candy load. Everyone adores that little kid. His uncles are liable to spoil him as usual!
As for costumes? I’m going to panda him. I figure soon enough, I will not get a vote, and the idea of him toddling along, holding my hand, in a plush panda suit? How cute is that going to be? I’m going to be a ghost under a sheet. I have always wanted to be like Geena Davis in Beetlejuice, walking around draped in white, with eye holes cut out lolol I am so lame! Bitty is going to come as a butterfly queen. This involves a diaphanous dress with all the colors of the rainbow, a set of fairy wings, and a mask on a stick with a scatter of butterflies coming off where the eyebrows are. Lyric and Rhamp are going as fuzzy dice lolol! You know what I’m talking about, right? The ones that hang from rear view windows? Lyric is going to be pink, and Rhamp is in black, and before Layla is slapped with the traditional sex roles stereotype, we put a bunch of fabric samples down on the floor, and they both went for those. Nothing we could do. The household’s seamstress made the blocky, stuffed costumes, and they are a stitch!
Are the Brothers dressing up? Well, you know the answer already to some of those. Zsadist? Absolutely not. V? Over his cold, dead body, apparently. Tohr is willing to wear a mask, although I suspect it is of the non-whacky variety, but hey, he’s in! And Autumn is trying to pick her favorite Disney princess (I think Jasmine is going to win.) Wrath is going as a zoo keeper with a pith helmet- think Steve Irwin only not with a blond wig. George is going to be his lion- and strangely, George doesn’t seem to mind the costume! Blay and Qhuinn are planning to be the Blues Brothers, and Layla and Xcor are doing the Beauty and the Beast routine. Lassiter? David Lee Roth. As if he could be anything else? Rhage is going as Aquaman, Jason Mamoa style, and Mary is going to be a Tootsie Pop (white slacks with a big, stuffed ball of red fabric with white details on it.) Phury and Cormia are going to be the two old folks from that painting, American Gothic, and Butch and Marissa are going as Gianni Versace and Elizabeth Hurley in that black dress with the gold safety pins? John Matthew and Xhex are going to be Neo and Trinity. The Band of Bastards are dragging their feet, so I’m not sure where they’re going to come out on the decision, and Fritz and the doggen are going dress up as their favorite Krispy Kreme donuts. Ruhn and Sax are thinking it’s the Bounty paper towel man and the Great Gatsby, but I believe they are still considering their options.
Anywhoodle, I’m sure I’ve forgotten a couple of people. And I’d be lying if I didn’t say I wasn’t ridiculously happy at the idea of everyone coming together- oh! My costume! I forgot! I’m going as Eleven from Stranger Things! She’s my hero...
Aries (March 21-April 19)
Cancer (June 21- July 22)
Virgo (August 23- September 22)
Scorpio (October 23- November 21)
Capricorn (December 22- January 19)
Pisces (February 19- March 20)
I’m really glad you’ve opened this up to things other than romantic issues. My husband and I moved into the home of our dreams four months ago. It’s not a huge mansion or anything, but for us, it’s perfect, especially as we think about starting a family. We saved up for five years to make the down payment, and it needed some work which we happily did, but probably couldn’t really afford right now.
Vishous: You need to get a flamethrower.
V: Fine. How about tree trimmer. Eye for an eye. Take his arm and part of a leg. *wipes hands* Sorted.
Mary: Okay, I will agree with you on that one point at least. Abutting properties does not make for automatic friendships, but for the common good, people do have to get along. I truly believe another attempt at discussing the situation face to face should be made (provided Tree’d Off and her husband feel physically safe to do so.) And then, if things persist or escalate further, you may have to look into legal remedies. I don’t know what state you’re in, or what the law says about things like this, but if he did kill your trees in an impermissible manner, then he needs to make that right.
Mary: *rubs her head* Tree’d Off, please let us know how this goes as you seek a peaceful resolution.
Big surprise, Halloween is my second favorite human holiday. Hello, candy and scaring humans- plus horror films everywhere! What could be better, other than pin-the-tail-on-the-angel?
This movie led to a franchise of other feature films and remakes (11, I believe?) and also novels, videogame(s) and comic books. There’s even another contemporary film with a reprise of the original cast coming (Halloween Kills.) This original standard is widely credited with reviving the horror genre in the eighties, leading the way for a whole host of slasher films and franchises, including Friday the 13th and A Nightmare on Elm Street. 
1:36 Real Housewives of BH ref with Kyle Richards, and we can give a shout out to the old school carving of the pumpkin?
5:55 Mask up
12:17 Back in the days when kids carried books, not laptops... and walked twelve miles through the snow to school. Love the wool tights, btw. Do they even sell those anymore?
25:04 Annie, stop harshing on our girl, there’s nothing wrong with saving your money and staying home
44:03 Annie, you’re getting on my nerves.
1:03:59 Bob, no offense, but you have no stamina. And Linda, your standards are too low. That sh*t lasted a minute and a half.
1:06:32 Mike: “Huh. How m’I gonna get my knife back and still keep this shlub off the floor?”
1:20:42 “Knit, two, pearl, one- stab my brother in the neck.”
1:23:25 Is anyone else thinking of The Shinning here? Closet time, except roles reversed. And I’m sorry, but Michael would be able to bust that sh*t totally open- oh, he takes my advice. By the way, I’m not going to lie, the first time I saw this, I was scared sh*tless.
