My year of yes followed a significant birthday, and began with a drive of ridiculous proportions to see a band I was only barely aware of. I could probably sing along to a couple of choruses. Nod my head to the beat. You could hardly call me a fan. But a friend was going and asked if I’d like to go too. So … why the hell not? Yes!
That year I went on crazy vacations, and embarked on a foolhardy but wildly passionate long-distance love affair. I tried whisky tasting and white water rafting, I ran a half-marathon, took part in two Tough Mudders, danced naked in the rain, and threw caution to the wind. It was awesome, and the power of yes gave me permission to go beyond my comfort zone and play with the person I thought I was. I still say yes way more than I used to. Yes allowed me to leave a dead end job. It led me to launch my own business. And it brought me to New York.
But I’m starting to wonder … what if I said no? To that “just one more drink” when I already have a buzz on and a 7.30am circuits class in the morning? To that dinner with a toxic friend I don’t want to offend but who will leave me emotionally drained? To that request for my time and expertise from the professional contact who takes but never gives back? To that project that compromises my core values? To that person who asks me to betray a confidence?
What if I refused to loan my adult son yet more cash? What if I set clear boundaries – for myself and others – and, with love, respect, and compassion, just said no? I’m learning that my ability to say no makes my yes even more powerful. Because it is wholehearted and given without reservation. Not out of a desire to be liked or out of guilt or fear I may offend, but from a place of authenticity and love.
What one thing will you say no to this week?
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I have tickets. And I know you want them. Rick Riordan’s best-selling novel, The Lightning Thief, has been turned into a Broadway musical complete with Greek gods, monsters, and supernatural powers. Just email tickets@w42st.com for a chance to win a voucher, valid for two people, for the performance of your choice (restrictions apply). Do it before Monday at midday!
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TODAY
It’s National Taco Day
You know what to do, my friends. Eat. All. The. Tacos.
Cosplay universe
New York Comic Con runs all weekend. And, unless you were organized enough to get tickets months ago, the closest you’ll get to the action is standing behind Spiderman in the line at Sunac. Find out more.
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TOMORROW
Strut Your Mutt
Dog yoga and reiki, paw printing, a Smooch Your Pooch photo booth, music, contests, giveaways, and a beer garden with "pup trivia” – this fundraising event is in aid of animal shelters and welfare, and it’s all kicking off at Pier 84 at 10am. Find out more.
Food in the park
Celebrity chefs, panel discussions, tasting sessions, and a fancy meal – it’s all part of the New York Times Food Festival at Bryant Park. The main ticketed events are now sold out, but there’s still a ton of free stuff to do. Find out more.
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SUNDAY
Shop vintage
Switching from summer to fall closet this weekend? The UWS Grand Bazaar is on the case, with an opportunity to pick up anything from vintage dresses from the 60s, to original Levi’s, graphic Ts from the 80s, and mid-century furniture and lamps. Find out more.
Reduce, Repair, Reuse, Recycle
Learn how to do more to save the planet and hear from elected officials, city organizations, and local, grassroots groups at Mathews Palmer Playground. Find out more.
Get ready to samba
One of Brazil’s most celebrated carnival queens will be leading two samba workshops today, from 1pm-3pm (beginners) and 4pm-6pm (intermediate/advanced) at Ailey Extension. This is a rare visit from Egili Oliviera. Come on, God wouldn't have given you maracas if he didn't want you to shake ‘em. (Bonus points if you identify the movie that quote came from.) Find out more
See a clown in a gown
RuPaul’s Drag Race champ Bianca del Rio takes her Jester Joke Tour on the road, telling stories of her travels around the world and the "circus" that is her life. Find out more.
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TUESDAY
Have a cider party
Look out for the story of East Hollow Cider in our November issue. But if you can’t wait, whet your appetite with a fall party at As Is, where they’ll be launching new products with cider flights, cider on tap, and some special pours. Find out more.
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WEDNESDAY
Farmers Market
A fall farmers market is coming to Rockefeller Plaza, with honeys and syrups, baked goods, meat, eggs, cheeses, wine, spirits, and more from local farms. Find out more.
Color your life
So, at lunchtime you could pick up the usual sandwich. Sit in the office canteen. Or … release the workday stress with a free coloring session. Pencils and paper are provided. Find out more.
Come on, vogue
Dashaun Wesley, one of the actors from FX’s Pose, leads a vogue workshop that includes not just the dance moves, but an insight into the history and basics of the technique. Find out more.
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THURSDAY
Cake by the Hudson
To launch the Intrepid museum's Navy Cakes exhibition, we're hosting a very special, by-invitation-only, VIP reception with celebrity chef Duff Goldman, our own fabulous food writer Michael Munoz, and Zachary Schmahl, from Schmackary's. It'll be sweet! I'm allowed to bring a couple of personal guests to keep me company. So tell me about your favorite childhood treat and what it means to you, and you could be joining me for a slice of history.
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