Day 1: The Inner Guru

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Solstice and the 25th have now passed, the days are once again getting longer and we are in those liminal days that come before we welcome in the New Year. In the ocean of time that humans have existed the Gregorian New Year is a relatively new festival however, this time of year has always important. 

'In pre-Christian Rome under the Julian calendar, the day was dedicated to Janus, god of gateways and beginnings, for whom January is also named' (source)

Gateways and beginnings - I love that.

I mentioned in the blurb for this course that I have not always spent this time of year in a way that really worked for me. Its not that I was a 'party hard' kind of person but somehow I would still find myself getting swept up in what felt socially right (fun while it lasted) and consequently would start each new year feeling drained, depleted and with a very jangled nervous system. As my yoga practice became more integrated into my life I found it impossible to live with this dissonance.

Nowadays I use this time to have a spiritual clear out. To reflect on the last 12 months, to explore the experiences I have had, see how they are living in me currently, to notice what lessons I have learned, need still to learn or need to let go of - sometimes we need to shut old doors so that new ones will open.

This is a potent time for inquiry and self awareness.

It is my hope that you use these 5 days to connect to who you are at your heart; to let go of the pressure that you might feel to 'be' someone, to notice the labels you wear that can be wonderful at times but also not, to dig down a little bit deeper in order to surface with clarity and intent on the 1st of January.

That is what I was alluding to when I named this course ‘from Darkness to Light’. Yoga asks of us that we practice, that we do the inner and outer 'work’ with temerity, that we study ourselves (as opposed judgements & nit picking) and that we surrender what we no longer need. We take the 'darkness' and let it lead us to 'light'.

From Darkness to Light  is encapsulated in the etymology of the sanskrit word guru:

The syllable Gu indicates darkness, the syllable Ru means its dispeller,

Because of the quality of dispelling darkness, the Guru is thus termed.

— Advayataraka Upanishad, 16

The guru doesn’t just show us the way, the guru is the way.

The contextual meaning of the word guru is ‘teacher’ - a teacher who can dispel and transmute ignorance, heaviness and darkness by shining a light on what is within.

So who is the guru? Traditionally it would have been a wise spiritual person who would guide the aspirant to their higher purpose. But these days sitting down with a spiritual teacher is a luxury. Firstly you would have to find one (and with so many self-proclaimed and false ones out there this can be a minefield) and then you would have be able to take time aside from active family/work life to attend them.

For the majority of us this simply isn't possible - so instead we look for another way, we look to the inner guru, our own souls, our deep knowing. Yoga tells us that we already know everything we need to know we just haven't realised it yet, by taking the time to practice inquiry & self awareness everything that life offers us has the potential to be both teacher and lesson.

You might learn from the person sitting next to you on your commute who you found intensely irritating, you might learn from the unexpected actions of a stranger, maybe it's a pearl of wisdom found in a book, your children, your animals, nature, a casual truism, a poem on the tube or even a social media meme - our best teachers are often the most unexpected.

Because of this we come to see that lessons may be independently and all at once joyous, painful, confusing, complicated, surprising, hard-earned, unwanted, plain as day, brutal, beautiful and so much more. 

We may not like what life throws at us but we most certainly can learn from it.

A shift in perspective is transformative.

For me, this prayer sums up what is it to live in alignment. I think the words are beautiful.

Imagine trusting yourself so wholeheartedly that you felt able to really be yourself? Living in alignment doesn't mean living without fear but it does ask that we listen to our intuition.

The Mahābhārata lists 5 distinct gurus; mother, father, teacher, sacred fire and the soul (ātman). This 'soul guru' is also what we can call our intuition.

In the chakra system (the yogic view of how energy moves in the body) the seat of our intuition is the point between the eyebrows called the ajna chakra or third eye. Qualities of Ajna Chakra are wisdom, self-reflection and vision.

Chakra expert and psychologist Anodea Judith tells us that this area of our energetic body develops in our teen years. It is in those years that trauma to this area can leave us with damage to our intuition.

Without going too far down the rabbit hole it can be very helpful to cast your mind back to your teens and see if you can identify occasions when you intuitively knew something but it was quashed (think of possible incidents with teachers, authority figures, trusted adults or elders). When the development of our intuition is damaged shadow qualities such as delusion and denial can occur (source: Eastern Body Western Mind, Anodea Judith). 

Paradoxically an antonym of intuition is knowledge. The more we 'learn' about the world the harder it is to connect to our intuition, my goodness those learned behaviours can ambush us, as quick as our intuitive gut feelings arise we override them.

One way to re-connect to intuition is to get quiet. The journaling practice below asks you to do just that; still your body and mind and take just a little time to reflect on your relationship with your intuition.