You knew it was only a matter of time. You knew that they were cooking up something, that they were just in the briefest of hibernations, that they wouldn’t let this one (omg, hopefully 🤞) shining moment pass without some fakakta theory as to why the coronavirus is here, and why it’s so. fucking. bad.

And a-one, and a-two and a…

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Welp, Sorry, Everything’s Corona Today