MELVIN
 
 

“Oh my God!”

Marlene's hushed voice came from behind me. I lifted my tear-streaked face, thinking it was her hand on my head.

It wasn't.

It was Erica's hand.

And she was looking directly at me, her lips parted slightly, as if wanting to speak.

The realization of what was actually happening shook me hard.

She was staring at my eyes with recognition. Fixedly. Unflinchingly. Her brows furrowed, as if willing her mind to remember who I am.

Swallowing, I raised my left hand. Slowly, inch by inch, until my fingertips touched her hand.

I held my breath as I waited for any adverse reaction. 

There was none.

I struggled to breathe normally. Gently, I put my hand over hers.

And waited, again, for any negative response.

But she just continued to stare at me steadily, as if seeing me for the first time in her entire life.

I swallowed again. Dare I take the next step? I knew the answer even before I finished the question.

My heart pounding fast inside my chest, I grasped her hand.

Still no reaction.

Biting my lower lip, I intertwined my fingers with hers, our eyes still locked.

She blinked for a few seconds. Repeatedly, like someone wanting to remove a speck of dust caught in their eye.

My breathing stopped. I have never been this scared.

Was it my imagination, or did her eyes became dreamy, like she just had a happy thought?

Slowly, I pulled down our clasped hands from my hair, guiding her palm to my mouth. My quivering lips placed a chaste kiss on its center. 

I almost cried out loud when she didn’t pull it away. Instead, she let her hand stay and continued to look at my eyes.

Oh my God. If this was a dream, I don't ever want to wake up.

I swallowed to keep myself from speaking, afraid I'll ruin the moment.

I couldn’t believe this was happening. She allowed me to touch her, hold her hand, kiss her palm. I was drowning in the depths of her brown eyes fixated on mine.

Time stood still.

There was no one else in the room.

Only us.

Erica and I.

Suddenly, there was a loud crash behind me. 

Startled, I blinked, breaking our eye contact.

Almost instantly, Erica wailed out loud. High-pitched, incoherently, she whined, sounding like a wounded animal. She jerked. She put her legs up on the chair and hugged them to her chest. She rocked back and forth, her wild, bulging eyes riveted outside the window. 

Angrily, I turned to look behind me. A nurse was staring at us. She was in a state of shock, the tray of medicines fallen on the floor.

The doctors and the other nurse were now rushing into the room with Max. 

Marlene, on the other hand, had been behind me all along.

Max sternly told me, "Melvin. Get out. Now."

"Dad…,”

"NOW, MELVIN!"

There was no arguing with him. He was furious at what happened. I knew he was blaming me. I took a last look at Erica, seeing that the other nurse was already preparing a syringe to inject into her.

Dejectedly, I obeyed Max. I went out to the corridor, waiting for them to come out.

But in my heart, I already knew what I must do.
 
 

***

 
After what seemed like hours, Max, Marlene and the two doctors, Dr. Alba and Dr. Ford, came out of Erica's room.

Max's face was still fierce as he rushed at me, his fists clenched. "I'm disappointed at you, Melvin. I told you seeing her was not a good idea. Look what you did! They had to sedate her. Your presence brought more harm than good!"

This time, I was not the least bit intimidated by his anger. "I don't think so, Dad."

"You don't think so? Then why did she react like that? Melvin, I want you to leave.” He pointed at the door, his mouth set in a hard line. “Now." 

"No, Dad. I won't leave her. Not anymore." I held my ground, powered by a new-found confidence in me.

"What do you mean? Melvin, I don't want us to part ways like this. It's better if you leave her alone!"

I shook my head, my conviction unyielding this time. "No, Dad. I will not leave her. I’m withdrawing the annulment. I already called my lawyer.”

"What?" His face was contorted with anger, his voice raised. “You fool! You’ll just make things worse for her! Did you see what happened? She reacted violently to you!”

"Dad, that's it!” I snapped at him. “She reacted! She reacted to me! Instead of being unresponsive, she responded! Not violently at first. But she was looking at me! Straight to my eyes! She was beginning to recognize me! If not for the nurse making that noise…Dad, I was holding her hand! She was looking at me. She recognized me!”

"Melvin, you're hallucinating! It's not…,” Max started.

"Max." For the first time, Marlene spoke, her voice firm. Her husband turned to her, his face still red with anger.

"It's true, Max," she conceded, her eyes teary. "Erica was looking at him. She allowed him to hold her hand. For a month, she hasn't been responding to us in any way. She just sat there like a statue. But with Melvin…”

Max’s eyes widened. He opened his mouth, then closed them again, his forehead puckered. He was speechless.

Gratefully, I smiled thinly at Marlene, silently thanking her for her testimony. But then, I frowned as her words sunk in. "For a month? She has been motionless for a month? I thought she was being treated with medication and ECT?"

Dr. Alba answered me, his face apprehensive. "Against our better judgment, Max and Marlene signed a waiver to stop all treatments because she became hysterical. They were afraid those will harm her and the baby.”

"You mean you just let her stay like that, without any medical support?" Incredulous, I blurted out.

"It's what we thought was right for her, Melvin," Marlene insisted.

"It isn't right to deny her treatment, Mom.”

Coming out of his shock, Max reasoned out, "But she is calm that way.”

I shook my head. "Calm, yes. But not treated."

They weren’t able to argue with me on that. It was a truthful statement. She was left alone with no medication and no treatment for a month, left in her own devices, in her own dark thoughts. How will she get well? How will her mind be able to heal? 

Doctor Ford, who has been listening to us, took a step forward and laid a hand on Max's shoulder. "This changes everything, Max."

"Doctor…?" he looked confused.

"There may be a chance that Melvin can contribute to Erica's recovery."

I heaved a grateful sigh. "Thank you, Doctor."

"Don't thank me yet, Melvin." Dr. Ford said gravely. "There is no certainty that Erica will fully recover, even with you around."

"I will take even the slimmest chance of recovery, Doctor," I insisted.

"You don't understand, Melvin." He motioned to us to follow him to a sitting area at the end of the corridor where we all sat down. "You will have to re-introduce yourself to her mind gradually. Bit by bit, every single day. Remember that her catatonia was caused by a deep-seated depression brought about by extreme fear or denial of that fear. Of what, we don’t know. Her brain cannot be switched on and off that easily. You will have to tread carefully. Erica's condition is every bit an enigma and can be extremely frustrating. That means a lot of patience and consistency of behavior are needed from you, Melvin."

I nodded. "I know. I understand."

"It would require being with her but without the intimacy, Melvin."

"I know,” I reiterated. My nostrils flared. What did they think I am? “I am aware of that. And I don’t care. I am prepared to do anything, anything, just to see her get well. Don't you understand? Our marriage is not just about sex. I have loved her for so long, she is already a part of me. She is in me. My mind, my heart, the core of my being, is bound to her. And it stays that way. In sickness or in health. Till death." 

Every word was stated with a finality they cannot dispute. They all exchanged muted looks.

Still, Max was doubtful. “I’m not very sure about this…”

The decision was taken out of his hands by the events that followed.