Saturday I began a four day stay in the hospital for pneumonia.  I ended up there after a few days at home battling fever, fatigue, and other unpleasantries.  After my temp had spiked one more time, Kristine brought me into the ER where pretty rapidly they had x rayed my lungs and diagnosed me with pneumonia.   

Those of you have gotten to know us more recently may not know that I have for many years dealt with a condition called Ankylosing Spondylitis.  Like Rheumatoid Arthritis it is an autoimmune disease that attacks my joints primarily up and near the spinal column. In my 20’s it was the worst and brought pain and stiffness and loss of mobility to my neck, hips and back.  Since 2007 I have been taking Remicade, a biological drug that keeps the inflammation under control. Though some of my mobility especially in my neck is indefinitely limited, my pain has been greatly reduced and further damage stopped.   It has in many ways been miraculous.

Yet as with most amazing drugs like this, the downside is that it weakness my immune system.  I am “immunocompromised”. It potentially contributed to the pneumonia.

I had a lot of time to think lying in bed at home and in the hospital.  Some of the thoughts were certainly fever induced paranoia and fear, but in such situations some of the thinking is also crystal clear.   One thing that I am certain of is that God uses suffering. He has used it in deep and impactful ways in my faith, though it has not always been fun.  He uses it in the lives of his people throughout the Scriptures and history in these ways. There is deep mystery to it, myriads of unanswered questions, and our own limitations, but God is always at work.  

Being laid flat on a hospital bed is a pretty clear reminder of how fragile we are.  It was a sobering wake up for me to the reality of suffering that occurs “far as the curse is found”.  And like it or not, I am still living in the land of that curse. Even as we have begun to consider buying a house in the area and thought of long term plans, it recalled James words in 4:13 -15 “Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit"-14 yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. 15 Instead you ought to say, "If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that." - James 4:13-15.”

The hospital bed also has a powerful way to throw aside all the trivialities of life and focus on what is valuable and cherishable.  My sweet beautiful patient wife Kristine, serving me and my kids selflessly in grace. Caleb and Evette with all their joy, complaining, energy and creativity, trouble and laughter.  The love and care of my parents, in-laws, brothers and sisters in blood and in law. And the innumerable ring of believers and friends who surround us and pray and care.

And even deeper, even beyond this is that most basic and foundational of realities which exists in healing or suffering, life or death, that of me and My God.  One of the passages I often prayed to be more true in me was Psalm 73:23-27 “ Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory.  Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. For behold, those who are far from you shall perish; you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you.  28 But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord GOD my refuge, that I may tell of all your works. - Psalm 73:23-28

Other the last few weeks I had been preparing my talk for this saturday’s (tomorrow’s) Albanian outreach, thinking about how to speak to the arguments and doubts of those who will be there.   I don’t need to be worrying about that this week as thankfully Filip, one the Albanian believers in Quincy will be delivering the message. (Praise God for him and please pray for him!) But I’ve been thinking alot, not about arguments against the virgin birth or deity of Christ, but rather the argument that says “what's the point anyways”.. what relevance does Jesus have to 2018?  

    It’s true society has made incredible progress in 2000 years in education, science, architecture and other fields, especially technology.  Its true in our cell phone we hold unimaginable access to information. But let’s face it, not much has really changed in terms of the most important things of life and our greatest problems.  There are wars and rumors of war, people starving, poverty in the world and in our neighborhoods. Yes, I likely would have died 2000 years ago from pneumonia, but I will die sometime of something, and people all around us are dying of sickness, accidents, sadness, and old age.  Our families are still broken. We still yell at our kids. Everyone is still worried, fearful, scared and stressed and more than ever before no one talks about it. The one thing we have advanced greatly at in 2000 years is finding 1000’s of ways to numb ourselves from all these problems so we can say that everyone and everything is fine.  

    That’s what I was going to say to the Albanians and will say in conversations with them and will say to you.  It is why we need a Savior. It is why it is such incredibly good news that God came down, took on human flesh, dwelt among us and died for us.  To solve all these great problems of sin, suffering and death that we can’t do a thing about. If that is not relevant to my life and yours and the peoples’ lives around us, then nothing is.  

    Would you pray for our meeting tommorrow and for our outreach in general to the Albanian community, that God in his grace would open the eyes of many to see their great need for a Savior and the beautiful, wonderfully glorious news that “today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you, He is Christ the Lord.”

    But also I pray for you.  Don’t duped by this culture and its grand illusion that everything is fine.  Don’t be timid and embrace the tolerance of everyone’s all right and who really needs what I got anyway.

    Our world is still in ruins, the people around you are still ravaged by sin and death, and God has once and for all in Christ given us the solution of a Savior.  Hold it high and proclaim it loud this Christmas season.


Merry Christmas!!!
Kristine, Jason, Caleb and Evette