#WednesdayWisdom
"When you love yourself, what you allow looks different." — Lalah Delia
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Morning Musings
In fifth grade, there was a list that the boys in my class used to rank all of the girls based on their looks. One day, I happened to catch a glimpse of the list and noticed two "ugly's" next to my name. Next to my best friend's name, however, were two "pretty's," the result, I'd told myself of her light skin and "good" hair. I tried to shrug it off, but I was devastated.
The next year, when we were learning adjectives in Spanish class, my "crush" at the time called me feo, the Spanish word for "ugly." But being the nerd that I was (am?), I retaliated with "it's fea," to reflect the feminine ending. And one fateful day I forgot to bring Chapstick with me and the boys proceeded to call me Krusty the Clown. To this day, I bring lip balm with me wherever I go. Middle school is a bitch, y'all.
Thankfully, people outright taunting me because of my looks ended in middle school. Or so I thought. This weekend, after an inspiring conversation about body positivity with a coworker, I decided to tie up my shirt at the gym, thus baring my midriff. I was a fan of working out in my sports bra and booty shorts at my old gym, a women-only fitness studio. But under the watchful male gaze, I was admittedly feeling a bit self-conscious.
But it was hot af in there and while I didn't feel comfortable taking my top all the way off, I wanted to let my belly breathe. Looking in the mirror in the middle of my dumbbell thrusters, I caught a look at my curves and thought to myself, "Damn, girl. You look good!" Feeling myself, I took a post-workout selfie in the locker room and posted it to Twitter in response to April Reign's #SelfAppreciationSunday hashtag:
April retweeted it, 90 people liked it, and then one person commented: "Most women treat their body like a temple. You treat yours like the temple of doom." Yup. That happened.
But the difference between adolescent me and adult me is that I truly did not care. Granted, a stranger on the internet hiding behind a fake name, fake profile pic and with all of three followers is different from people you see IRL every day. And there's 20 years of wisdom and experience between me and that fifth-grade list.
I also know what this person said doesn't even come close to the body-shaming that other people experience. And why anyone sees fit to comment on someone else's appearance is still beyond me. But you know what? I posted another #GymSelfie the next day because haters gonna hate, trolls gonna troll and you've just got to do you anyway. As my husband reminds me whenever I come across someone trying to start something. #StayBlessed, y'all.
Love,
L'Oreal
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ICYMI
During the opening retreat for Willie's Warriors, a leadership initiative for Black women in Chicago, my new #GirlCrush Mia Birdsong referenced Tricia Hersey and her work with The Nap Ministry. The idea that "rest is a form of resistance" was radical to me. So I did what any self-respecting journalist would do, I went straight to the source and interviewed Hersey for Shine. And if you want to take a nap afterward, well, you're doing it right.
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For months now I've been warning friends and coworkers that our queen was coming for all our wigs. She'd been a little bit *too* quiet on Instagram, her social media platform of choice. And then, just like that ... BOOM, Ivy Park x Adidas, BOOM, Homecoming: A Film by Beyoncé, the Netflix documentary all about Beychella. And let's not forget: Lion King is coming out this summer. When you're a Beyoncé fan, you have to stay ready with Beyoncé money because you have no idea when she's about to drop her latest project, announce a tour, etc.
Just last week I was listening to the audiobook of Veronica Chambers' carefully curated anthology, Queen Bey: A Celebration of the Power and Creativity of Beyoncé Knowles-Carter. Featuring essays from Bey fans and critics alike, this is a must-have for every card-carrying member of the BeyHive. If nothing else, this book will inspire you to truly and fully live into and walk in your purpose ... just like the queen herself.
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Well, that's all folks. I hope you enjoyed this edition of LT in the City Weekly! Be sure to follow me on the Interwebs using the buttons below or simply click "reply" to tell me what you think. Thanks a bunches!
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