I am a play therapist. All of the work I do comes back to one purpose, and that is helping children overcome challenges and the effects of trauma. As I have worked with hundreds of families as a therapist, taught play therapy around the world, studied and taught at universities, there is a huge missing piece in work done for children recovering from trauma. Traditional treatment focuses on an individual child. Yet, it is impossible for a child to make lasting changes alone. One of the most important realizations I made is that the parents of my clients are my clients too. Parents have to be an equal partner of the healing team. Rapport has to take place with kids but parents must be involved with treatment as soon as it's appropriate. The parent is as much as your client as the child.
Recognizing that there was a missing anthology of tools in the play therapy library, I wrote a book that bridges the gap between academic theory and practical tools to ultimately repair and work to heal the relationships between parents and children. Secure attachment is the long term solution to pick up the broken pieces after a crisis occurs. For the mostly healthy parent, they can quickly become a resource for the child to learn healthy ways of communicating and connecting. Attachment fosters a sense of safety and security. For the parents who are the trailblazers and are changing the generational cycles of abuse or maltreatment, this book can offer you a roadmap to help guide them in learning new ways of engaging with their child, the importance of attunement, and managing their own affect and anxieties so they can help their child manage theirs.
My new book Attachment Centered Play Therapy gives you the tools to do just that. My invitation is that as clinicians you come to understand parents, provide education to them, and invite them to be part of the treatment team and important members of the play therapy process. Let them know that they aren’t going to be in therapy for the rest of their lives, but that its okay for this process to take time. Learn how to take the shame out of the experience of healing. When we know more, we can do better.
