#WednesdayWisdom
"I am who I am. I’m good with it." — Kamala Harris
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Morning Musings
Last weekend, my Wifi wouldn't let me be great. Naturally, I was on deadline for two freelance assignments. As my luck would have it, my resident IT expert (aka my husband, Jeff) was on a flight, so he couldn't help me troubleshoot. I must have restarted my computer no less than five times before I caved and used Jeff's laptop to crank out the articles and submit them on time. Then the real sleuthing began.
With Jeff's laptop on my lap and my laptop on the coffee table, I began frantically googling "MacBook Wifi not working," "MacBook Wifi connectivity issue" ... you get the point. Admittedly, I was half-paying attention and still googling when Jeff called to tell me he'd landed. Did I mention I maybe, sorta kinda have borderline obsessive-compulsive personality disorder? (It's okay, I'm working on it in therapy.)
Finally, Jeff convinced me to call it quits, turn off the computer and try again the next day. I reluctantly agreed on the phone and, after we hung up, went right back to trying to "fix it." At 12:30 a.m., nearly five hours after I'd gotten home, I humbly waved my white flag and went to bed.
The next morning, I went to yoga and rocked out to HOMECOMING while straightening up my house for a sleepover that evening with my besties. Yes, we're in our 30s and still have sleepovers -- it's the best!
We talked, we drank brut rosé, we ate and had more drinks all before falling asleep in my king-size bed. In short, it was the most fun I'd had in a long time.
The next day, I walked to brunch (it was a rare 70-degree day in Chicago), livestreamed my church's 11:30 service, read the latest issue of Essence, meditated, journaled, danced to Spotify's Rhythm & Praise playlist ... all of which I would have missed out on if I was tethered to my laptop.
And wouldn't you know it ... Sunday evening, when I went to open my laptop and get my affairs in order for the week, I was miraculously connected to the WiFi. The lesson here? Clearly the universe wanted me to sit down and ... do nothing. Which for an overly ambitious Type A high-achiever is virtually impossible.
As Jeff likes to joke, I'm allergic to white space on my calendar. And it's true, I have to fight my instincts to fill free time. Some people are addicted to alcohol, work is my drug of choice. I get physically uncomfortable "doing nothing" because I've been conditioned to believe I should be "doing something" at all times.
I believe I have to be productive at all times because my self-worth is tied to how much I can produce. "Doing nothing" feels like a colossal waste of time. After all, my to-do list isn't going to do itself!
But here's the catch, the to-do list is never going to be done. It's a scam. The stress and burnout we feel from doing the most, however? That shit's real ... and potentially deadly.
So do yourself a favor and do nothing. Even if it's uncomfortable at first. Even -- especially -- if you can be doing a million different things. Your body and brain will thank you.
Love,
L'Oreal
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If you've been following this newsletter for a while, then you know how much I love my girl Anuli and pretty much take all of her recommendations to heart. So when she told me about the astrology app The Pattern, I was hooked. Although admittedly I didn't download it at first because I was afraid of being read for filth.
And the app has certainly hurt my feelings on more than one occasion, but it's also been pretty spot on. The Pattern uses your astrological birth chart (the date, time and place of your birth) to determine six aspects of your personality -- and let's just say the results are creepily accurate.
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