the signs you already know..

It's funny how yesterday Fia was happily singing along to Barry Manilow , until it struck her that she didn't even believe the words any more.

It's kind of the same thing for me with this story. I'm not sure I'd even write this any more, because I don't even believe in wrong ways. Looking back on my life, I've always been happy to change my direction the minute I figure out it's the wrong way for me. But until then it's exactly the way I need to be going...

I remember walking in the redwoods a few years ago. I was following a quiet inner voice inside that told me I needed to drive the eight hours north from San Francisco & go to a particular grove & then walk until I found what I was looking for. So, I did. I drove until that voice said Stop. I parked in the lot & set out on a trail & walked back into the soft shadows. Whenever I came to a fork I asked the voice which direction I should go. Go left, it said. Other times it said Go right. I kept walking as the trail got more & more narrow. Finally, it disappeared altogether & I was walking through grass & weeds. I looked around & since there was no one else in sight, I just spoke out loud. Where do I go now? I said. The voice I'd been listening to the whole time said Where do you want to go? I was astonished. I said, I thought you were taking me somewhere. The voice replied, I was. But you were so sure you knew where you were going.

I was miles into the redwood forest, not near anything & it was my own damn fault. I did the obvious next thing. I started laughing. When I finally stopped, I asked Where should I go now? The voice said Where would you like to go? I said I'd like to go where you'd like. Good, said the voice, let's go back & try this all over again. So, I turned around & headed back towards the parking lot. Along the way, I stopped & saw tiny wildflowers & banana slugs & smelled the deep, rich scents of an ancient redwood forest. After a half hour of walking, when I was finally quiet enough to listen, suddenly I was surrounded by the sound of twenty or thirty high-pitched voices. Like bells. Or the hum of dragonfly wings. What is that? I asked & the voice said Shh. Listen.

Turns out there are fairy guardians of each redwood forest.  Turns out my inner self wanted to introduce me to them, so I could learn things that no human could teach me. Turns out that was the whole reason for coming. Turns out it took me twice as long because I was so sure I was there for some other reason. Turns out my habit of listening only long enough to have a better idea is one I have to watch very, very carefully. HA. 

But that is another story...:-))

with love,
brian

p.s. 'wrong way' is now available as a print. Fia asked me if I wanted to do it as a storyplate, too. It's a beautiful Montana evening. She's sitting out on the back deck while I'm at the computer. I said no. HA. (If you'd like it on a plate, let us know. We'll put it on our possibilities list for next week...) But if you just want the print, click here...