I went to a coffee shop yesterday and decided to order a coquito latte.
The word coquito was new to me, so I mentally rehearsed the pronunciation in my head as I stepped up to the counter. Co-keet-o. Don’t mess this up.
When it was my turn to order, I sputtered out, “can I have a coke-itto latte please?”
And as I asked myself exasperatedly in that moment, I did so this morning too: why did I mess it up?
The question reminded me of something I read in a manuscript I recently helped edit. It was about EFT Tapping, an acupressure treatment sometimes used to treat war veterans who suffer from PTSD.
The author claimed that our brain doesn’t hear negative words, like “don’t,” “can’t,” and “won’t.” As a result, in EFT Tapping, you are told to say “It is not okay for my life to change.” In the brain, this translates to “it is okay for my life to change.”
Logically, this makes sense. When you don’t want to think about something, you often do. Don’t think about the smell of cookies baking in the oven, the cooling taste of ice cream on a hot day, the way cheese oozes off a fresh slice of pizza.
If you’re anything like me, you’ll now be hungry.
When you keep telling yourself to not do something, that idea implants itself in your mind. And once it’s in your mind, it becomes harder to not act on it.
The solution is to think in the affirmative. Instead of “don’t think about junk food,” tell yourself “think about healthy food.” Instead of “don’t mess this up,” tell yourself “be confident.” Instead of what you don’t want, tell yourself what you do. Your stream of consciousness is in your control and it is yours to embrace.
Imagine all the embarrassment you can save yourself. The possibilities are endless.
