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Be secretly incredible.

– Bob Goff

Four years ago, when I was planning my big move into my own home, I had a Pinterest-inspired fantasy of decorating it modern farmhouse style, with lots of white and weathered wood and black accents. That didn't happen and I'm glad, because my home's more colourful and somewhat eclectic decor reflects my personality a lot better than a picture-perfect style would have. 

Oddly enough, last week I was finally able to give my bathroom (which is typically builder-grade boring and beige-y) a bit of a farmhouse makeover. I had found a cute black-and-white gingham rug at Winners that I couldn't resist. I put it in front of my bathroom sink and that settled it. The next day, I bought some black matte knobs to replace the nondescript nickel ones (as well as a matching towel rack for behind the door), and then I painted an old wooden frame black and inserted some simple artwork I created. For about $50, I was able to freshen up a previously dull room. It's still not picture-perfect (which is why I'm not showing you all of it) but it feels a little less generic and more "mine". . . and that makes me smile. Know what I mean?

There are times when our lives or careers or healthcare need a major overhaul, and we need to take quick action. But sometimes a little adjustment here and little bit of colour there is all we need. And it's fine to do it for yourself, even if no one else will see the change or care.

Surprise! I've made a printable gift for you all with the same floral border in my framed artwork, but with today's opening quote by Bob Goff: Be secretly incredible. You can download the print here. (If you feel like colouring it in, go for it!) :)

Remember, character is who you are when no one is looking. Below I share some more thoughts on not worrying too much about what other people think about us. 

P.S. Don't forget to enter this month's giveaway! Click here to tell me your top three favourite places to shop for gifts. I'll randomly choose a winner  on August 1. 

TV SHOW: Now that I'm investing in developing an art business, I'm trying to watch my spending so I've cancelled my Netflix membership. It runs out in a few weeks so, until then, I'm trying to pick out the best shows to watch. Last year I enjoyed The Big Family Cooking Showdown so I was glad to find Season 2 available on Netflix. It's fascinating to observe how creative people can be with cooking but what I really like is watching families work together, especially when they have to overcome differences of opinion, taste, or methodology. (And I think Tommy Banks and Angellica Bell are better hosts / judges than the previous ones.)

When I was 15, I had to write a little blurb that would later appear next to my graduation photo in the school yearbook. Before listing my cherished memories, pet peeves, activities I was involved in, and closest pals, I shared this quote I'd come across: “There is no reward from God to those who seek it from men.” If I'm honest, I think my motivation was to include a mini-sermon in my blurb. I wasn't necessarily living by this maxim.

This tidbit came to mind a few years ago as I was reflecting on a truth about myself, one I felt God was challenging me to confront. I was thinking about how I’ve always struggled to make sure I have the approval of people around me—and I don’t just mean my parents and teachers. Even strangers or mere acquaintances were not safe from my big approval-catching net.

Mind you, there’s nothing wrong with living in such a way that meets with the approval of most people around you—if you’re doing so out of a sincere impulse to live rightly. However, it’s not ideal (nor healthy) to base every action and decision on one’s perception of how others will react. Not only does this set you up to potentially make a lot of bad decisions, but it’s also exhausting. . . and futile.

The irony that I ended up approaching life almost completely opposite to the words of wisdom I’d imparted on others three decades earlier did not escape me. The revelation was momentarily disheartening but it also gave me clarity and the opportunity to change my approach. It allowed me to ask God to change my heart and to move from being a people-pleaser to a God-pleaser.

Why is this important? Because being a people-pleaser is not the position of humility and servitude it appears to be on the surface. Instead, it’s just another way of keeping one’s focus on oneself. We think of people who don’t care about others as being self-centred and conceited, but being a compulsive people-pleaser is simply the other side of the same coin.

We live in a world where people on both sides of a political divide put a lot of energy into what we now call virtue signaling or moral posturing. We see the same problem in Christian circles with doctrinal debates. The compulsive need to have others see us as good and virtuous and morally superior seems to be spreading like a virus. 

I'm still a work in progress but I thank God for helping me shake off my compulsive and chronic craving for approval and affirmation. I am at peace when I focus on doing what He leads me to do. It's made my life simpler and more joyful. 

Galatians 1:10 makes it abundantly clear where our focus should be (and circles back to my yearbook quote): “For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.”

whimsy & wisdom from the world wide web

It's the middle of summer. If you regulary have kids around, you might be pulling your hair every time you hear, "I'm booooored." Here's a website packed with ideas for crafts, games, outdoor activities, snacks, and more. 

"Although writing is a creative process, talent alone will not move you forward if you want to earn a living as a writer. You must start with administration and finish with marketing. Think of these two brackets as the bread and your creative work as the innards of your sandwich. Without the layers, you basically end up with salad. Here are some ways to make your first layer solid." - For new or veteran writers who want to make a living from their craft, here's my latest blog post.

Amber North is a university student in Montreal whose parents I knew before they were married! As part of a writing mentorship program, she shared her experience of dealing with a concussion, scoliosis, and being misunderstood by her peers. This could be a good article to share with other young people struggling with physical or mental health issues.

NOISOME

(adj) having an offensive smell

Do not be so open-minded that your brains fall out.

– G.K. Chesterton

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