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Compassionate Boundaries
August 19, 2021
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First, From the Heart
How do we articulate and respect boundaries for ourselves in life and leadership? It requires we tap into numerous skills in our compassion toolkit, starting with awareness and empathy. Think of boundary setting as compassion in action that aligns our work and life so they coexist peacefully.
We summon our fierce self-compassion, along with nurturing self-compassion, to support us. To learn more about these essential qualities, please join us Sept 10 as we host Kristin Neff as our guest presenter and practice leader for our next Global Compassion Community Gathering. Many of you are familiar with Kristin’s pioneering research that defined the field. Her new book, Fierce Self Compassion continues to deepen our understanding of what it means to be a compassionate leader and thriving human being. We hope you can join us for this important community event on Sept 10.
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Best of the Blog
Creating Compassionate Boundaries
In the midst of the turmoil and chaos of these times, setting or resetting boundaries is one of the most important compassionate leadership moves to create a thriving organization. Good boundaries connect us to each other, focus us, and support our wellbeing. Boundaries also protect us. When you map out clear boundaries, especially in collaboration with your team, you set up everyone for success. Read more.
Photo Credit: Jan Canty on Unsplash.
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Research Worth Sharing
All in a day's work: Boundaries and micro role transitions
by Blake Ashforth, Glenn Kreiner, and Mel Fugate
in Academy of Management Review, July 2000, Vol 25, No 3
How do you navigate the boundaries between the different roles in your life? This paper, written in 2000, provides a clear analytical framework for analyzing the way we move between different roles in our lives. As these boundaries have undergone a seismic shift during the pandemic, and will be reshaped again over the coming years as people return to the office, the topic remains timely. This article is for leaders who want to be intentional in shaping the permeability of their team’s work environments. To become better equipped… Read the research.
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Practice Matters
No!
Notice how little humans know exactly what they want? They will scream and fuss until they get exactly what they need or want. They don’t need to think much about saying, showing, or spitting up a big, clear NO!
Along the way from early childhood to any life stage beyond, we often lose our sense of certainty about what we need or want. Sometimes we actually do know but suppress it. Perhaps we believe we are not worthy, deserving, and don’t honor our own needs before we attend to the needs of others.
A simple no should be easy enough to proclaim. But if we are not in touch with what we want, how do we clearly state our preferences so that others can respond in ways that work for us and them? We can’t set boundaries without clarity and a strong sense of agency.
Good boundaries keep us nourished, safe, seen, and appreciated. They support our physical, emotional, energetic, and mental wellbeing. We can focus our precious time, energy, and resources in alignment with our values and choices. Intentional boundaries allow us to orchestrate and integrate our work and personal selves with grace and ease, instead of stress and overwhelm. Get to know your no. Befriend your boundaries. The power of your inner truth will show you the way.
When can we practice? Always!
If you'd like to explore additional Practice Matters, you can find them here.
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Upcoming Events
Global Compassion Community Gathering
Free Community Event + Guest Speaker Kristin Neff
September 10, 2021 12:00-1:15 PM EDT / 16:00-17:15 UTC
We invite you to gather to practice, inspire, and ignite our collective hearts and minds to birth a more compassionate world. Our guest presenter and practice leader is Kristin Neff. Kristin is an Associate Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. She is a pioneer in the field of self-compassion research, conducting the first empirical studies on self-compassion nearly twenty years ago. She is the author of the bestselling book Self-Compassion. Her newest book is Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive. The event is co-hosted by Laura Berland, our Founder, and Monica Worline, co-author of Awakening Compassion at Work and Stanford University researcher with the Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education. Please register for the free event to reserve your spot. Find out more and register here.
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