NATURAL-BORN TWEETER

Jose Canseco played 17 seasons of Major League Baseball, but some of us are more familiar with his other talent — tweeting. His unpredictable commentary and long-standing, documented hatred of Alex Rodriguez are the stuff of Twitter legend. 

YOU'LL SHOOT YOUR EYE OUT!

A Christmas Story is a perennial holiday staple. Any reference to the film immediately brings to mind images of leg lamps and Red Ryder BB guns, creating cozy, yuletide nostalgia for anyone who’s seen it. Interestingly enough, though, that wasn’t the original intention. 

“It was a movie [about] obsession,” Jean Shepherd, the man who wrote the short story the film was based on and the movie’s narrator, once explained. “Now, you probably didn’t know that … you thought it was [about] nostalgia. … But this was a kid who had an obsession with a dangerous thing.”

Tim Grierson delved deep into the Red Ryder’s history, and looked at recent arguments that there’s no place for BB guns in our Parkland world. 

XXXMAS CHEER

Last year, we started a horny tradition that we like to call “The 12 Days of XXXMas,” introducing you to some of our favorite sex workers. We’re back this year with a new lineup, so strap in and start jingling those bells. A couple of early highlights (the series started last Thursday and will run until Tuesday, December 21st):

What can’t Joanna Angel do? The multi-hyphenate adult star has interviewed bands, directed and produced porn films and written erotica for decades. It’s that last bit, though, that Miles Klee was particularly interested in. And so, he sat down with the alt-porn icon to discuss how she’s brought a distinctly sexy wrinkle to her literary pursuits (and the choose-your-own-adventure genre).

TS Madison has always known who she was, and after hustling her way into the limelight, she’s ready to shine. Jake Hall interviewed “the original big dick bitch” about being freed by sex work, thriving online and becoming a reality TV star. 

DEEP CUT

The True Story Behind Adidas’ ‘All Day I Dream About Sex’ (And Other Bogus Brand Acronyms)

Adidas has been dreaming about sex for over 40 years, Fords have been ‘Fixed Or Repaired Daily’ for 60. Even Spam has a backronym, dating from WWII. But are any of them real?

WEEKEND ROUNDUP

Alfredo Di Lelio’s fistfuls of fettuccine. Gifts with superstitious symbolism. Are pancake and waffle batter interchangeable? How to beautify your balls. A guide for adding color to your wardrobe. Push-ups don’t work your biceps. Juice bar sabotage. Bitcoin-for-murder plots. Why do guys love jerking off to celebs? Gifts to buy for a dog. Why weed is so expensive. A new use for Viagra. The best part of the Winning Time trailer.

TWEET OF THE DAY