Notes from Therese Ross
~ Executive Director ~
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The recent weather pattern of frigid days suddenly broken up by mild temperature days is a bit like the unpredictability of grief; expectations for one moment to the next can't really be counted on. But what CAN be counted on is the consistent support for children, teens and their families that Rick's Place offers.
Sadly, the pandemic continues and with it people continue to die. In fact, the numbers are shocking: nationwide at this point, 900,000 people have died and from January 2020 to November 2021, over 167,000 children under the age of 18 lost a parent or an in-home care provider. Obviously, not all of those deaths are directly attributed to Covid-19,(approximately one out of every 450 children under the age of 18 lost a caregiver to Covid-19), but no matter the cause, all of these children will now live without their significant person. Always.
Recently very important research as been shared by the Covid Collaborative ( https://bit.ly/3JtbUN0 ) describing that "The consequences of losing a parent or other caregiver can persist through a child's lifetime" - and is considered an adverse childhood experience (ACEs*) by the CDC. The report also shares that our evidence-based model of peer grief support is vitally important: "Recipients of peer support show lower levels of anxiety, avoidance, and depression, and higher levels of grief resolution." This last point underscores the Rick's Place mission to support children, teens and their families who are grieving.
We would not be able to provide this essential peer grief support without help from you our donors, funders, and friends. Thank you!
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From Charisse DelVecchio
~ Program Coordinator ~
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After a brief winter break, we began another season of virtual programming with our Rick's Place families on January 25th. Our strong cohort of returners helped us welcome several new families, and we are thrilled to see our groups grow this year. Although we felt some disappointment as we transitioned back to remote meetings following a series of successful in-person groups this fall, our virtual meetings have proceeded with enthusiasm, care, and dedication from group members and volunteers. We credit our successful programming to these participants and volunteers who continue to show resilience, flexibility, and perhaps most importantly, excellent senses of humor as we continue to adapt to pandemic realities.
This January, we completed our first ever virtual volunteer facilitator training. New volunteers attended a series of sessions designed to educate about supporting grieving kids and families and develop group facilitation skills. Five new group facilitators completed our training, and have already begun providing grief groups in local schools.
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~ Barbara Werum Richard ~
I have been a volunteer with Rick’s Place for over four years now. I retired at 60 years “young” and spent a year doing AmeriCorps service. I was looking for volunteer work that was different, meaningful, impactful, and completely outside my usual frame of reference.
Unlike many volunteers/staff at Rick’s Place, I had been fortunate not to have experienced any losses in my young life or, as an adult, the loss of a spouse or child. I didn’t fully understand such grief and thus I wanted to learn.
And I have learned so much!
I have had the opportunity to work with children and caregivers and other volunteers during Tuesday evening sessions at Rick’s Place. Most impressionably, however, for me have been the experiences co-facilitating with Rick's Place staff in school groups in the area — high school, middle school and elementary classrooms. The slow unfolding growth of trust; the incredible bonds that form among the kids; and the visible release of tensions when the students come to know that they are not alone in their grief journey is awe-inspiring. It keeps me coming back for more.
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We are so fortunate that foundations in our community understand the benefits of grief support programs for youth. We are honored to have received funding from The Osterman Family Foundation for peer grief groups in three area schools in 2022. And we are pleased to announce that the DanceAthon Foundation of Westfield chose Rick's Place as a recipient of funds from their February DanceAthon event that will allow us to offer groups in six schools in Westfield this year.
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Here are two brief reviews of books to consider sharing with children. We welcome your feedback and any suggestions for other books for us to review.
Samantha Jane’s Missing Smile by Julie Kaplow and Donna Pincus (2007) (Ages 4-10)
This is a lovely, illustrated book about Sammy Jane whose Dad died six months ago and is very sad. A kind, close neighbor helps her with her grief and anger and gets Sammy Jane to open up a little. The book includes some closing pages by Jane Annunziata, PsyD with some practical knowledge and suggestions as a “Note to Parents”.
If Only by Carole Geithner (2012) - (YA Fiction)
This is the story of a young girl chronicling the year after her mother’s death from cancer. Corrinna has to start and then get through 8th grade with all the attendant feelings of grief, loss, and anger. She also has to learn to live with her devastated father. This books hits on all the themes we explore at Rick’s Place and should be a source of solace for children and parents alike. The author is a clinical social worker with decades of experience with children who are grieving.
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Did you know that recent studies find up to 91% of people who are grieving report sleep problems? Sufficient sleep is essential to physical and psychological well being. While many of our physical and psychological reactions to grief may endure, we may be able to improve sleep quality through practicing sleep hygiene.
Sleep hygiene is a practice of maintaining an environment and routines to promote regular and uninterrupted sleep patterns. Through manipulating our schedules, routines, and settings, we can minimize the barriers to a good night’s sleep. Below are some tips to help promote sleep hygiene.
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Avoid screen time for at least one hour before bedtime. Lights from our electronics can make it hard for our brains to get ready for sleep.
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Avoid naps. Although it may be tempting, napping during the day almost always complicates sleep at night.
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Avoid caffeinated or sugary drinks in the evening. Caffeine and sugar can keep the body awake and alert for hours after consuming them.
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Move your body during the day. Staying active helps the body relax at night.
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Create a comfortable sleeping environment. Make sure the room is dark, quiet, and a comfortable temperature.
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Get some sun exposure during the day. This will help your body maintain its natural sleep cycle.
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Have a consistent night time routine. Do the same things in the same order each night before bed. This might include stretching, brushing your teeth, putting on pajamas, and reading.
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Find a relaxation technique that works for you, and try it out 30 minutes before bed.
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Be consistent in your sleep schedule. Try to go to bed at roughly the same time each night and wake up at the same time each morning, even on the weekends.
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Interested in becoming a Volunteer Facilitator for Rick's Place? We will offer a training in the late summer. Reach out to us or click the Volunteer button below.
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