September 2022

26th September 2022,  20 years since my Grandpa Noel died. So much of who i am was inspired by him and the love he gave me. Hours of walking me around London in my buggy describing architectural features, teaching me to look up at the world around me and see all the wonderful details. Im lucky to have so many photographs he took, seeing his point of view decades after hes gone. Seeing similarities between the angles and subject matter he photographed and what I like to capture too, city rooftops, of architectural details and construction happening. I will always have the 8 year old inside me wishing for a longer time with him, feeling robbed of a beautiful relationship and bonding experiences. He never got to see my art but he loved and supported me from when i was scribbling on paper and curated it on my wall. I wish i could have seen more of his own art and gone on adventures to inspire us together. One day we will be reunited in another universe and we’ll eat coffee cake and talk about heritage, architecture and art forever. Here’s a photo he took of me in 2000 days before my 6th birthday, we are in Tate Modern and in the background you can see the Millennium Bridge (which I remember him telling me was wobbly when first constructed, you can see its actually closed off in the distance and remained shut for 2 years to fix the shakiness) and his favourite St Pauls Cathedral as well as Barbican to the right. Another picture I came across was one I took of a book of his with some post it notes in it where he has written about the Hampstead viaduct and how much the landscape has changed in 100 years. This also happens to be where (he chose?) to have his ashes scattered and where we visited first on the day of his passing. Dad grew up in Hampstead 57 years ago, almost 60 years of growth and he pointed out how much nature had grown and changed in that time too.

I created these collages because there are thousands of pictures of his to choose from and it would be impossible to share them all but I wanted to show different aspects to him, as a Grandpa, as an Architect/Town Planner and as a Photographer. His photographic eye was very much guided by his architectural mind so those parts of him overlapped massively. He was from Ohio, came to London on his and Grandma’s honeymoon and fell in love with the city. They were able to get jobs in Town Planning and moved to Hampstead. I say that to explain how much Grandpa loved taking photos through his rose tinted glasses at the history and architecture and design all around. I look at so many photos hes taken and they seem like postcards, or adverts for London like the ones of The National Portrait Gallery and Trafalgar Square (before it was pedestrianised), a red double decker bus in front of The Royal Albert Hall and the bright lights of Piccadilly Circus. In the 70s, over 20 years before Mum and Dad bought our house in Southgate, he had travelled here to see our local (iconic) tube stations designed by Charles Holden in the 1930s, amazing examples of his style of architecture. Arnos Grove and Southgate station on the Piccadilly Line, with vintage cars,  blue skies and luscious greenery surrounding them. Grandpas passion for Architecture and Town Planning is reflected in Charles Holden’s approach to designing Southgate tube station which integrated into a bus station as well as shop fronts to merge with the rest of the high street. 

The final photograph I want to highlight is one of Temple Bar (the stone archway structure amongst greenery). It is one of 8 gates to the City of London (London is the capital city of England, but within that is a smaller area known as the City of London which dates back to the 1100s). This gate was designed by Christopher Wren and made between 1669 and 1672, which was part of a redesign of London after the Great Fire of London in 1666 devastated the city. By 1874 damage was beginning to happen, and it was no longer effective with changes to modes of transport in the 200 years since it was built. A rich man had it taken apart stone by stone and rebuilt on his property/land called Theobald Park where it stayed for another 200 or so years. That was until a committee was formed to reunite the gate with the City of London and Grandpa Noel was on that committee. I have vague memories of us visiting it in Hertfordshire with mum, dad and Grandpa (before my brother was born). I didnt realise that the reconstruction of Temple Bar happened in 2004, two years after Grandpa died so he never got to see it brought back into the city. I cried when I made the connection at 3am, because I can always associate not only St Pauls (which he loved so much) but specifically Temple Bar with his memory and everlasting imprint on my home city, my heart, London. Here is a photograph I took years ago of Temple Bar with St Pauls in the background.

Having the jubilee and her death in the same year is too much empire nostalgia and monarchy bootlicking than is bearable as the descendant of colonised people. Ancestors who were transported from India by the greedy british empire to their plantations in Guyana, the Caribbean. the british media is very much pro-monarchy and any differing opinions have been squashed aggressively and defensively. Just because people “love” and “respect” the queen doesnt mean i have to take them seriously… its hilariously sad seeing these tributes, some from artists and anti-colonial activists which blows my mind. How did someone born into extreme wealth teach us anything, inspire us to do anything? Most of these tributes are bullshit arselicking and its so hilarious/sad to see celebs and institutions around the world make out like she was a hero. My mum was born in the newly independent Guyana in 1967, but the rest of our family and ancestors were born in british Guiana, the clue is in the name…and before that our ancestors were from british India… monarchy/empire are rotten violence, owning countries/people isnt ok. That violence is within living memory, the violence is still felt across the globe to this day. I have been energised, galvanised and enraged alongside my fellow colonised people of the world who are rightly calling out the violence her family and her represent. Britain stole $45 trillion dollars from India over a 200+ year span, approximately $75 trillion is owed to ex-colonies. 

The only reason there is a “commonwealth” is because britain OWNED our countries. There would be no such organisation if people had been left on their own lands with their own resources. The framing of commonwealth as this global family is disgusting and disingenuous. Charles’ speech about diversity and faith, the service the queen upheld for all across the commonwealth is a disgrace. The world would have been a better place if royals/colonisers didnt destroy it with greed and violence and racism. Our climate crisis would have never happened with Indigenous peoples caring for our planet as they have done for thousands of years. White european greed has destroyed the planet and they have the blood of millions and millions. 

Righteous anger towards these parasites of the earth, who have traumatised and subjugated generation after generation of families across the globe to pain and suffering while they live in their palaces. We’re meant to care and stop everything for someones grandma who benefited from that? No way. No true anti-imperialist, anti-racist, anti-colonial person could ever waste a single tear on her. We laugh at the memes and join together globally as colonised people in this moment but truly no justice has ever been found from the violence and devastation caused by britain and european colonial powers, the destruction is immeasurable.  

How was the queen serving her country when not only was she sitting on blood money she was so greedy as to try to smuggle money out of the country for her own selfish greedy needs to tax havens!!!??? People are brainwashed while their taxes pay for this multi billionaire family who own 6.6 billion acres of land across the globe. They are the biggest freeloaders in the world! Why dont people understand that by the very fact royals exist means theres a system which puts all of us at the very bottom. Their PR is so strong people are convinced the royals serve us?!?! Fuck your imperial family! Fuck your commonwealth!! We didnt choose to be part of your colonial club!!!

250k people were queueing for over 12 hours to see the queens coffin. Houseless people along the queue in central london were moved and discarded while brainwashed jobless zombies stood in the cold and rain and given blankets and food! Many people who queued were angry that celebrities were able to skip the queue, upset that there is a two tier system. I cant comprehend their mindset, the fact monarchy exists in itself is a two tier system!