As the coronavirus continues to interrupt lives, facing unique challenges has become the new normal. Some obvious effects of the outbreak are the impacts on the economy, our education systems, and the environment — but it seems the pandemic and its stay-at-home orders throughout the US have also managed to wreak havoc on the nation's marriages.

There has been talk amongst relationship experts and family attorneys that divorce rates will spike post-pandemic when courts are open and operating.

So here is what you should know if you are considering or currently going through a divorce in the middle of a pandemic. 

4 Reasons Why You Should Consider Mediation As An Alternative to your Divorce

As an alternative to having your Divorce decided by a Judge, parties interested in obtaining a personalized resolution to their conflict should consider Mediation. Mediation is a private process, handled outside of the court system, that allows two opposing parties to resolve their conflicts with the guidance of a mediator that has both party’s best interests in mind. Once an agreement is reached by both parties, the mediator will then act as an advocate for the resolution of the issues rather than provide a final ruling on the matter. Saving both parties, involved from the hassle of a lengthy and costly court battle.

Cost

One or two days of mediation are far less expensive than one or two years of litigation. Parties that are interested in resolving their disputes may bypass the litigation process either in part or entirely with a pre-trial settlement. And if all of the issues are not resolved through mediation, then will be referred to the other legal options remain possible.

Confidentiality

Unlike most court cases, the Mediation process is confidential. The Mediator is bound by confidentiality, which means information disclosed by either party during the course of Mediation cannot be used as evidence at trial. Nor can the Mediator be called to testify to statements, offers, or information made by either party during the mediation process.

Comfortable

During Mediation, the parties are not expected to follow the formal routine court rules. Mediation is an interest-based resolution process that allows each party to express their individual needs and wants in order to reach a mutual agreement on the matter.

Customization

Mediation can be used as an opportunity for each party to control the outcome of their disputes. The responsibility for reaching an agreement remains in the hands of the parties. Which means neither a judger nor the mediator “decides” the outcome of the case. Mediator simply guides both parties as they reach an agreement to resolve their case.

Co-Parenting with a Purpose

The Impact Divorce has on Children

Divorce is a transition many will face, so it is important to be aware of what can help ease an already hard-hitting situation. Being mindful and respectful of all parties involved is key, especially when innocent children are involved. Changes may vary depending on the child’s age during the time of separation. Although older children possess the capability to rationalize better than younger, emotional stress will impact functions related to cognitive abilities.

In theory, older children have a much richer understanding of the world and relationships because of their social and emotional development, but this may cause them to take on the responsibility and burden of the divorce. In turn, adolescents can become angry at themselves, parents, friends and other relatives. Acting out aggressively or even signs of depression can infer this is an effect of the separation.

Other potential areas of impact can include:

• Decrease in language stimulation
• Resentment of Holidays and family traditions
• Abandonment of faith and religious practices
• Increased likelihood of economic hardship
• Unhealthy daydreams and fantasies of parents reconciliation

SOLUTIONS:

Co-parenting is a popular term that can alleviate some stresses that children are experiencing.  

Traditionally trust is built up over time during social and emotional development. Divorce shakes and potentially shatters the foundation that was in the process of development.  Having to divide and spend time with only one parent weighs heavily on the child’s priceless and evolving mind.

Co-parenting can help alleviate this burden and revive trust.  For example if parents make a conscious effort celebrate some special occasions such as a birthday or preserve special traditions “together” it allows the child to normalize these moments and feel secure in the changes that have been forced upon them.

Additional Solutions:

- Open communication and providing age appropriate truths about the separation.

- Showing genuine love and affection that is not based on gaining favoritism over the other parent. 

- Seeking positive reinforcement from family, community, counselors, youth groups, etc.  Allowing children to express their feelings in a save environment.

- Hire an attorney knowledgeable in family matters. 

- Consider mediation as an alternative to trial.  Generally, children do not participate in the mediation process and the parties work together with a third party neutral to resolve all aspects of the divorce without having to go to court.

Need Help Modifying or Enforcing your Current Divorce Decree?

Sometimes prior agreements need to be modified due to changing circumstances, or an agreement may need to be enforced because one party is not complying.

In addition to a change in circumstances or a case of a non-compliant party, there may be issues of modification and enforcement because 1) three or more years have passed since the entry of the divorce decree, 2) child support may be inadequate, or 3) the other party may be denying access to the child/ children.

Issues surrounding non-compliant parties include situations where a former partner has outright violated a divorce decree, support order, or visitation order, or a former partner has failed to pay child or spousal support.

At Dodson Legal Group, we regularly assist with these issues.

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