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Bring Civility Back for All of Us

During these changing and chaotic times, we can both teach and model civility to our children. 

When emotions run high, it is tempting for some people to express their frustration through aggression, rudeness, crudeness, negativity, inflammatory or discriminatory remarks, arguing, and even violence. The lack of eye contact and face-to-face nature of social media and the internet also makes it easier for people to be unkind in what they say, post, or write. 

One simple answer to these complex problems is civility. While rudeness and bigotry beget more rudeness and bigotry, so does kindness beget kindness. 

We believe that one act of kindness, no matter how small, can be more powerful than one act of unkindness! There are many kind and respectful civil acts happening in the world, and we need more of these experiences throughout our world.
 
So, let’s take a look inward and examine our own posts on social media, our own conversations in front of our children, and our own behaviors and make a change. Today! 

Here are some teaching tips for being more civil minded with your kids: 

  • First, seek to understand before being understood. Listen. Really listen. Avoid saying or doing something with a knee jerk reaction that you will regret. So, when you respond, show that you listened by paraphrasing what the other person said, then respectfully respond with your view. We all can agree to disagree without being mean and rude to each other, including our family members. 
  • Set boundaries with social media for yourself and your kids. You could examine various posts as a family and discuss them. 
  • With older children, you can discuss how colleges, coaches, and employees often comb candidates’ social media and can reject them for inflammatory and discriminatory posts. 
  • Practice respectful debating skills. Have a mock debate at home in which you assign both sides of an issue and argue each side and then discuss both points of view. 

Now more than ever, we need to come together and realize how we need to get along, and that starts at home.
 
We all need to avoid negative people who are destructive, demeaning, and cause trouble and let our children know those behaviors are unacceptable. 

Treating others as we want to be treated always brings about good, even if it is not immediately apparent. We need to show by example that we can be civil to one another and demonstrate constructive ways to iron out our differences and live in peace. Let’s show our children positive and effective ways to get along and treat each other with respect. Being civil and kind can be contagious, so let’s start a civility and kindness movement! We are better together and need to build bridges, not barriers, between us. Being more civil is a great start! 

Wise Words

“Aspire to decency. Practice civility toward one another. Admire and emulate ethical behavior wherever you find it. Apply a rigid standard of morality to your lives; and if, periodically, you fail as you surely will adjust your lives, not the standards.” 

—Ted Koppel 

“We treat others badly not because we don't understand how people should be treated but because we don't really consider them people.” 

—Michael Austin 

“Civility is not a tactic or a sentiment. It is the determined choice of trust over cynicism, of community over chaos.” 

—George W. Bush 

“Do things for people not because of who they are or for what they do for you in return, but because of who you are.” 

—Harold Kushner 

Wellsville Rockin’ Recipe – Yummy Butternut Squash Soup 

Ingredients:

  • 1 medium butternut squash 
  • 1 yellow onion, chopped 
  • 2 cloves garlic, smashed or minced
  •  2 Tbsps. olive oil
  •  1 ¼ cup 1% milk
  •  ¼ tsp. cayenne pepper 
Directions: 

Cut the squash into wedges or in half. Scoop out seeds, cut off the rind, and dice the squash. Heat the oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add the squash, onion, and garlic. Sauté until lightly browned and the squash is cooked through. Place the cooked squash in a blender and add the milk and cayenne. Blend 3-5 minutes until the mixture is smooth. 

You may add vegetable broth until you reach your desired consistency. Reheat. Top with low-fat shredded cheese or roasted pumpkin seeds. 

Makes 4 servings.

Nutrition Information: 

Approximately 190 calories, 7 grams fat, 28 grams carbohydrates, 5 grams protein, and 7 grams fiber.

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