Pat Fagan disagrees strongly with Brene Brown, American Author of Five #1 New York Times Best Sellers, who says “True belonging doesn’t require us to change who we are, it requires us to be who we are."  Rather, as all happy spouses know, true belonging sometimes requires deep change --which usually becomes apparent when the honeymoon period has passed and "ordinary" life begins. And when children come along, even more change is needed.

A 2020 study investigated the associations between sense of belonging and health across young adulthood, middle age, and older adulthood life stages. The study drew data from six cycles of the Canadian Community Health Survey (CCHS), which included a total of 703,304 individuals, aged 18 and over. Results indicated that individuals with stronger senses of belonging exhibited higher levels of both general and mental health across all three life stages. It also found that the health of middle aged adults was most impacted by a very weak sense of belonging.

A 2020 Korean study examined the impact disaster relief had on senses of belonging, pride, and mental health among 550 citizens of Daegu, which had the second highest rate of COVID-19 infection in the world. Participants included 285 women and 265 men, aged 20 to 65 years old, and results revealed that sense of belonging increased after COVID-19 compared to before the pandemic. Moreover, individuals who received a national disaster relief fund had a higher awareness of belonging.

A 2020 study from Spain examined the psychological impact of the COVID-19 pandemic three weeks after the outbreak.  Participants included 3,480 individuals, aged 18 and older. The study found that persons with a greater sense of belonging were less likely to feel depressed and anxious and were less likely to suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder.