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APRIL 19, 2021
Consent Culture
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Hi there, it's sexual awareness month.
We all know a survivor of sexual assault; we may be a survivor ourselves. And yet, not enough is done to prevent and protect.
For one, I often see and hear sexual abuse awareness and education only in the context of college-age persons and older, which does a disservice.
- "About 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys experience child sexual abuse (CSA) at some point in childhood. So in a class of 20 kids, 5 of those children can be victims of CSA.
- 91% of child sexual abuse is perpetrated by someone the child or child's family knows & trusts.
- Those who molest children look and act just like everyone else.
- As many as 40% of children who are sexually abused are abused by older or more powerful children.
- The younger the child victim, the more likely it is that the perpetrator is a juvenile.
- Juveniles are the offenders in 43% of assaults on children under age six. Of these offenders, 14% are under age 12."
Source: Rosalia Rivera, Consent Parenting
Seeing the stats in print is sobering. But, what can we do?
As someone committed to justice, we can start by educating ourselves on child sexual abuse and how to prevent it.
This week's newsletter provides resources on understanding, discussing, and practicing consent culture.
Let's learn, engage, and act with consent in mind.
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1. Learn
5 Ways to Create Consent Culture in Your Household
Live Session April 29
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Join an interactive workshop about creating consent culture in your household. Often, the idea of discussing consent with children feels awkward, but consent culture provides your child with communication skills, encourages autonomy, and fosters healthy relationships.
Top highlights:
- One hour of live, guided learning
- Recording made available only to the enrollees of the live session
- Plus a Q and A session
- Presentation slides
- Suggested readings and activities
Instructor: Fatima M. Smith
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A Note On Values
Our Shared Commitment To Equity
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PoGM access and equity.
If you identify as a member of the Global Majority (Indigenous, Black, Brown, Asian, Pacific-Islander, Latino, Hispanic, or Latinx) feel empowered to access one of the limited FREE spots made available in partnership with instructors.
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Discounts or scholarships.
In partnership with instructors, Humble Teacher offers a limited number of lower-cost seats for those who need it.
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There is no application or questions to answer. We trust you know what you need. For course-specific codes and details, refer to the FAQs section on each course page.
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2. Engage
Join Us In Community
Listen to a diversity of perspectives and discuss what you've learned this week in a brave space.
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3. Act
Action Item
Consider and Reflect Change
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Instructions
1. Read. Read the following excerpt from Consent Parenting founder Rosalia Rivera.
2. Reflect. Reflect on the questions and answers.
3. Discuss. Discuss with a trusted friend who will also hold you accountable. What resonates? What feels uncomfortable? What ideas are you challenging? What gives you peace?
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Your whole body is private property.
 By Rosalia Rivera
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"Your whole body is private property. This is what I want all kids to know. That means that if someone puts their hands on your shoulders in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, that counts as an unsafe touch too!
I definitely teach that certain parts are especially private and are not meant to be touched or asked to be seen by anyone other than them or their safe-caregiver (it's important that kids know what a safe-person and safe-caregiver means [check out my other posts on that]); OR that they are shown other people's private parts or asked to touch someone else's private parts.
What I'm also saying is that kids need to know that safe and unsafe touch can happen to any part of their body if it's a touch that makes them feel uncomfortable.
More importantly, it means that they can use their voice to speak up and express their lack of consent in the following ways:
- 'Can you stop? I don't like that'
- 'Please stop, that makes me uncomfortable'
- 'I didn't consent to that'
- 'I don't want you to touch me'
- 'Please don't touch me without permission'
Teaching kids that their whole body is THEIR private property is an empowering piece of abuse prevention and consent education.
Practicing this is also key!"
The information authored by Consent Parenting founder Rosalia Rivera in this excerpt is provided by them as a free resource. Consider supporting Consent Parenting through consentparenting.com.
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Reflection questions.
- In what ways are you practicing consent culture in your home?
- How are you modeling consent culture for the children in your life?
- What words are you making sure to use when discussing consent?
- How are you making sure your child understands what you are explaining?
- At what age do you start talking with children?
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