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Next time, consider delivering in a Lyft, the cereal aisle at your grocery store, or during your yoga class. Claim denied.
Points in Case
"How to Write Funny" by Scott Dikkers, now on sale thru April 15 only.


We’re Not Denying You Had a Baby, But As Your Health Insurance Company, We Are Denying Everything Else
by Nancy Franklin

Next time, consider delivering in a Lyft, the cereal aisle at your grocery store, or during your yoga class. Claim denied.
 

When Am I Ever Going to Use This in the Real World, 2021 Edition
by Adam Dietz

The grocery store is like a math classroom come to life. This fact is true even as the global food supply chain crumbles.
 

Ooga’s Dinner Party Tips for the Busy Cavemaker
by Eva Meckna

Don’t invite Glug if you are having his former mate Praki who dumped him for that Neanderthal with the wheel.
 

List: History Altered Forever When Parents of Famous People Act as Modern-Day Snowplows on Twitter
by Keri Kelly

@beyoncedad: Really @starsearch? Girls Tyme is way better than Skeleton Crew, who were just caught doing very bad things. DM me for exclusive pics.
 

All of the Most Common Vegetarian Menu Items, Ranked
by Rachel Marsh

When you request to have the meat removed, they’ll still charge you full price so at least your bank account feels like you’re eating a real meal.
 

Making Your Bed with Ludwig van Beethoven
by Josh Sippie

Pull taut to create a vibrato of codependence, but not so taut that you further dislodge that which has already been established in the corners.
 

List: The Very Last People Who Should Qualify for the Covid Vaccine
by Matt Morea

The guy who told me he’d help me move, then stole my iconic Mallrats pin and puka shell necklace so he could more easily pretend to be me.
 

Calling All Baseball Game Popcorn Vendors, Pharmaceutical Reps, and Bar Mitzvah DJs: We Need You to Hand Out Covid Vaccines
by Leah Roemer

Geoff’s been out here slingin’ Coors Light at double-A ballgames for longer than most of these white coat jokers been alive.
 

I Am Your Free Spirit and I Quit
by Viktoria Shulevich

You dropped out of law school to travel around the world “like an Australian.” I knew this was the beginning of something special.
 


Enroll in "How to Write Funny" - The Official Video Course
by Scott Dikkers

The complete, one-stop, how-to manual for mastering the fundamentals of comedy writing, from the founding editor of The Onion. Includes 20 video lessons, access to private Facebook group of supportive peers, monthly 1-hour group AMA calls, three of Scott's bestselling comedy books, and six more cheatsheets and guides. Now ON SALE thru April 15 only!
 
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