How Are You (Really)?
Whenever you get asked how you’re doing, do you ever find yourself thoughtlessly responding: “Good”? I used to do that. But these days, I find it easier to just dodge the question altogether. While I prefer to listen to my friends talk about their feelings, I’ve noticed that I don’t like talking about my own sadness – as if I’m ashamed of my grief. I wonder how many of us hide our hurt and pain from each other just to appear strong, or at least functional, when we’re at work or with our loved ones.
I’m convinced that grief festers in the dark. The less I talk about my sadness, the more it will rot. I’m grateful to have friends who share their vulnerability with me. When they do that, it invites me to do the same. Perhaps, unseen is just me and Pedro telling each other, in front of the camera, what’s really going on in our lives. The next time a loved one asks “how are you,” try to not just blurt out your go-to response. If you’re up for it, tell them how you’re really doing. (SH)
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