Identity Shift
This morning as I was working out in my basement, I had a flashback to my old identity.
For most of my life, if it was winter, dark outside, or raining…. I would use that as a reason NOT to exercise.
Then I’d proceed to beat myself up and feel even worse about not keeping promises to myself. At that time, the scale was creeping up, yet again, and I felt hopeless and convinced it was too late for me to change.
It takes my breath away when I think about the person I am now, from the one I used to be…
Those changes didn’t happen overnight.
I was remembering how it all began, and what I did, (and still do) in order to IDENTIFY as a person who is no longer overweight, is a consistent exerciser, and truly loves to feel strong and fit.
So I want to share those with you:
Make a Decision - ask yourself, “Who do I WANT to be?”
Go over your compelling reasons, and review why it’s important to you, each day
I kept a photo of my “before” picture in a food cabinet. I would see it several times each day, and this anchored me to my compelling reasons, and it reminded me why I was choosing to do something a little uncomfortable.
Say NO to perfection - choose consistency instead.
Start SLOW - even if it feels like you’re not doing enough.
Our brain wants to talk us out of not being or doing enough.
My experience has shown me that these smaller, seemingly insignificant steps are exactly what is needed to get to the next level.
If you’re wanting to create a new identity, a great way to begin is to start focusing on something that you’ve already achieved.
We carry so many identities that we have no trouble believing.
I’m a loving mother,
I’m a caring spouse
I’m a good friend
I’m a great listener
I’m a hard worker
Can you remember a time when you were just starting out that you didn’t feel very strongly in that belief?
When you were new at your job, did you feel competent right away? Probably not, but we forget what it was like to put on that new identity in the beginning of doing something new.
For those of us who’ve never been successful in losing our weight for good, it feels almost out of reach to view ourselves as a person who loses their weight for good. - until it happens, and then - the belief doesn’t seem so hard.
When you were an infant, believing you were a walker, probably felt out of reach until you did it, failed, and kept trying until you were able to stand on your own two feet.
When desiring to create a new identity, it takes courage, vision, and belief.
I didn’t start out with very much belief that I could do this thing. I had a little success at first, but since I hadn’t ever had sustainable weight loss, I had a very hard time believing that this time would be any different.
The one thought that kept me going was that if my coach could do it, just maybe I could too.
For those of you who have struggled to lose your weight for the last time, borrow my identity, for now.
You may not see yourself at your goal weight, or you may not be able to see yourself as a person who loses their weight for good, but I DO, I see who you will become.
I see your new identity.
For me, losing weight is just one of my new identities. The work I did with my coach created such a remarkable NEW identity in me in so many aspects of my life.
No longer seeing myself as an overweight person was just ONE of them.
I invite you to play around with several
Fill in the blank
“I’m a person who_______”
”I’m no longer a woman who _____”
For example, some of my New Identities are:
I’m a person who consistently exercises and sees moving her body as a form of self care.
I’m a person who no longer talks unkindly to herself
I’m a woman who loves her life so much that food is no longer the most joyful thing.
I’m a person who truly delights in the success of others without making it mean I’m less than.
I’m a person who keeps her word. Who does what she says she will do, even when she doesn’t feel like it
I no longer see myself as obese or ugly, or lacking value
I’m a woman who loves herself fiercely regardless of the number on the scale.
I’m a person who now loves to track data in order to celebrate my wins and also see objectively what is my next best step to level up.
I no longer see myself as a victim of Hashimotos Thyroid Disease, post-menopause, or the specific foods I choose to consume.
I see myself as a person who has agency over every bite that goes into my mouth.
Of course we’re all a work in progress, so here are some of my new identities that I’m still working on:
I like to start these sentences out by saying …
I’m becoming a person who…..
is a business owner who has a clear view of the future.
is a confident coach
makes decisions easily
is not hesitant or fearful
How can you get started creating your own identity shift?
Start by answering the following questions:
Who is the person you want to become?
What is your current identity?
What can you already celebrate?
Who do you want to become?
As you “try on” the new identity (like trying on a new outfit), How do you feel?
My friend, you already KNOW how to stand on your own two feet
If you want to borrow someone’s belief in you, borrow mine.
Be patient. This work takes practice, courage, and compassion.
You’ve got this!
Amy
