Achieve your Weight Loss Goals Simply,
by Banishing These TWO Words
“HAVE” to and “CAN’T”
Hi my sweet friend,
What comes up for you when you tell yourself, .. “I HAVE to” do ______”?
I notice when I use that language over and over, I very rarely think about it. It just seems normal. But it also makes me feel disempowering and helpless.
I never questioned it. Telling myself I “HAVE to” just seemed the natural thing to say and think and do.
It wasn't until my coach showed me that it’s my choice to DECIDE how I want to think about a particular situation. Then I began to notice how disempowering and unhappy I was making myself. 🥴
So a simple switch, when you hear yourself say… I “HAVE to”___________, just notice it, notice how it feels, and then pause and consider switching to something better.
My favorite swaps are…..
I’m “CHOOSING: to______________ or I “GET” to ______________.
I used to be an “angry” cleaner. I’d wait until just before company would be arriving and then stomp through the house muttering about all the mess and how it wasn't my fault, and how I didn't deserve to “HAVE” to clean. and it’s not fair, ..etc. Looking for evidence of why it was horrible.
Once I changed the ONE word of “HAVE” to, TO “I’m CHOOSING to.. tidy the house, I began to come up with reasons why I love to clean. I LOVE having a clean home, I love being able to welcome people into a peaceful environment, (even last minute)
.. by the way…. If you live near Barto, you’re welcome to drop by.. anytime 🙂.
I love how I feel about myself when the house is tidy and organized. It feels beautiful, welcoming, and enjoyable.
So NOW I actually see cleaning the house as something I do FOR me, and for the people I love in my life. I use the time to listen to podcasts or books, and see it as a form of self care.
Try this experiment….
The next time you hear yourself say.. “I “HAVE” to go to the grocery store, take a pause, and reframe it to,... I’m CHOOSING to go to the grocery store”.. and then look for evidence of why this is true for you.
It could be because you want to choose healthy food for your body, you love to see what’s new, remind yourself that, “this is to support your weight loss goals. This is how I care for the people I love, including how I care for myself…”
Find a way to get “I CHOOSE to, or I GET to” phrases into your life, and see what an amazing difference it makes in helping you to feel more hopeful, optimistic, grateful, and centered.
Another word I eliminated is “I “CAN’T”
Especially when it comes up to food. For example when you say “to yourself, or others.. “I CAN’T have that, because I’m trying to lose weight”… How does that feel in your body?
When you hear yourself say I CAN’T, replace it with … I “choose” “I choose not to eat after 8:00 at night, and then look for all the reasons why you want to do this.
Or I’m choosing to leave a bite behind. “I don’t need to over fill myself. I’m having my own back. I’m becoming a person who no longer eats until I’m overly full, because it feels amazing.”
Why is this important?
When we feel like we HAVE to or CAN'T, our brain stops trying. Those 2 words are some of the most limiting, disempowering phrases. They make you feel trapped, helpless, and incapable.
Once I banished them from my inner chatter, I found that I had so much more bandwidth to embrace changing my life for the better.
Try it this week, and see what comes up for you?
I’d love to hear about your experience with switching those 2 words. Reply to this email and let me know any insights or take-aways you learned as a result.
If you’re feeling stuck and are convinced it’s too late to change, it’s time to prove to yourself what you’re capable of.
Be patient. This work takes practice, courage, and compassion.
You’ve got this!
Amy
