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Hello, dear Broadview readers,
During the first year of the pandemic, my husband and I struggled to look after our then one-and-a-half-year-old while also working two full-time jobs. Daycares were shut down, parks were closed and indoor gatherings with family and friends outside the household were banned.
After months of barely getting by, experiencing several breakdowns and feeling exhausted beyond belief, I seriously questioned why we didn’t live with my mom so we could get more help with my son.
I mean, I knew why: in my early 20s, my mom made it clear that as soon as I finished paying off my school loans, I was to move out of the family home. I couldn’t wait. My first apartment was a one-bedroom-plus-den condo in downtown Toronto, that, looking back, was an absolute steal compared to the out-of-control rents I see listed now. I relished living on my own; washing the dishes on my own schedule, staying out as late as I wanted, hosting parties with friends and nursing a hangover without my mom judging me for my absolutely normal lifestyle choices.
I lived in that condo by myself for six years until my husband and I moved in together and then bought a house in the east end of the city. By then, he had been living away from his parents for even longer than I had. And until 2020, I had never questioned our living arrangements. But as I read articles about parents with young children moving in with their parents to help share the load of child care and ease financial burdens, I began to long for the help.
As John Danakas writes in his recent story for Broadview, single-family homes are unique to Western society. “The North American fetish for privacy and autonomy (most pronounced, data shows, among white communities) leaves us blind to any housing option other than escaping from the family home as soon as we’re of age, as if someone yelled ‘Fire!’”
The benefits of multigenerational living are many, Danakas notes. So, “who’s the responsible steward?” he asks, challenging those among us who may look down on that type of living arrangement. Well, I may not be ready to move back in with my mom yet (I still have residual trauma from all the times she yelled at me to do housework), but I definitely see the appeal.
Read the whole story here.
Tell me: Do you live in a multigenerational home? If so, what do you like (or not like) about it? Or have you considered moving in with family members? If so, why?
Email me at c.tejada@broadview.org.
Take care of yourselves and thanks for reading Broadview.
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