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It makes me so happy that beverage brands and social engagements are catching up with the fact that sobriety can be cool, it can be festive!

Still, if you are newly sober or sober curious, or your social circle isn’t wise yet to accommodating non-drinkers, it can feel a little intimidating to navigate boozy engagements.

My favorite piece of advice is from clinical social worker Sarah Chotkowski, who specializes in substance abuse: “Get comfortable with ‘no thank you’ being a complete sentence,” she told us. “It can be tempting to over-explain your reasons for declining a drink, and launch into a long explanation that leaves you feeling embarrassed. Practice saying ‘no thank you’ and just ending the sentence there. Practice saying it in the mirror and with friends as needed. People will move on.”

The hold this guidance has on me. More advice should place the emotional burden on those likely to pass judgment, and not those just trying to safely have a nice time.

I am sober curious myself—I have predominantly stopped drinking as of March 2020—and to complement “no thank you” I also find it helpful to surround myself with supportive and chill friends and to drop beautiful non-alcoholic aperitifs in the group text.

Check out the rest of the advice experts gave us on how to navigate social situations (and enjoy life) as a sober (in any form!) person >>>

Melanie, editor at Nessie Sightings

PS: Hosting a social engagement? Ask yourself how you’re including those who choose not to drink. The coolest parties have festive options for all attendees.

Pentire Adrift is our favorite non-alcoholic cocktail, which our reviewer described as “a cool, breezy day on the North Atlantic coast”

If you care about your partner’s sleep hygiene you should invest in this cyberpunk reading light that drapes around your neck. I just got one and it keeps the room pretty dark while still illuminating the pages in front of me, and when I’m not using it it folds up like a little pretzel on my nightstand

This is like a fancy Brita and now it comes in two pastel colorways

I’m slowly making the full transition to a fully-refillable skin and bodycare products, so I might have to try Glossier’s refillable deodorant

If I lived somewhere wintry, I think I’d live in these unisex lodge slippers

My partner’s favorite skincare brand (and maybe yours, too) is having a sale on its surplus products

This very cool and very cozy and very insulated quilted bomber hoodie from Patagonia is also on sale

I just discovered JOJA’s activewear brand and I really love their sets

I went down a foam roller rabbit hole and found this targeted tension relief one that looks like a rolling pin, a softer version in black and white speckles (in case you’re getting tired of the beige fitness aesthetic), and THIS arm and leg massager contraption (I want to be the guy sitting under a tree relieving tension in his forearm)

Shoutout to my favorite hand cream (it’s half off)

I know we’re a few weeks into the calendar year, but this 2023 calendar featuring a different artist’s work for each month is so beautiful and inspiring and all of the proceeds are donated to Planned Parenthood of greater New York

I have major anxiety when it comes to bloodwork so I decided to splurge on this steamed dumpling stress ball to squeeze at my appointment this week

I think we should all consider smelling like sunscreen and summer when the seasonal affective disorder kicks in

We reviewed a bunch of one-gallon water bottles, and our favorite is from HydroJug: It has a handle and carrying loop, a leakproof seal, is dishwasher safe, and its modern design looks cool at the gym or on your desktop. For six weeks until the end of February, our readers can get 15% off your HydroJug order with the code NESSHYDRO (This applies to the big-ass bottle but also all their other products!)

Your tears have electrolytes, but you should still hydrate after a cry sesh

How to dopamine dress your home office

Why you’re seeing Nike fitness videos on Netflix

You can’t just catch up on sleep by sleeping in on the weekends

It’s rude to talk over the instructor in a group fitness class, even if you’re just trying to catch up with friends

The unhealthy reality of the “almond mom”

Rich and “well rested”

If you get a sore butt while cycling, this is for you

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