"But What's Your Real Name?"

My grandmother thought newborn Dolly looked like a perfect little doll and so here we are.

Despite decades of teasing (e.g. Dolly the cloned sheep, Dolly grips in movie credits, Dalai Lama, Dolley Madison, Dolly Parton ... and that's only my first name!), I cherish my unique, complete, legal name: Dolly Chugh.

Dolly the cloned sheep standing in a bed of hay looking to the left.

What would Dolly (Parton) do?

I especially love being associated with my (and your?) hero, Dolly Parton.

(By the way, courtesy of Photoshop and my imagination, I am doing my part to support her new Duncan Hines Dolly-branded cake mix ... given that the cake literally has my name on it!)

Dolly Parton standing behind a kitchen island with her hand on her special edition baking mixes. Dolly Chugh overlayed in the picture eating a piece of cake with a word bubble, "It's the least I can do"

You're lookin' swell, Dolly

I also lucked into having my own personal theme song. "Hello Dolly" has been sung to perfection by Louis Armstrong and has featured icon after icon on the big screen and big stage. The lyrics make it the perfect hype song … “you’re still going strong!”

I doubly love it when people sing it to me. Check out this 15 second surreal and special moment when I was serenaded by the legendary George Takei!

Montage of women in the Broadway performance, Hello Dolly.

What was your favorite toy?

Ironically, though, little Dolly didn’t play much with dolls. I asked my mom what my favorite toy was. “You really liked laundry baskets,” she recalled.

I mean, who doesn’t???

Two little boys in pajamas have fun and laughing while sitting in a laundry basket

My mom also recalled that 1970 Dolly had things to say and things to write, perhaps foreshadowing 2023 Dolly (though who could have predicted the wonder of Cocoa Bean or the annoyance of smartphone pinky?).

Young girl standing on a chair with a corded phone to her ear. She is wearing a heavy pink winter coat.

A woman standing holding a cell phone in her left hand. A small dog is sitting in front of her and looking at her.

Toys matter

I wonder now if not playing much with toys might have spared me from being socialized into a very specific toy culture, one in which boys and girls were marketed different toys and in which dolls looked nothing like me.

Picture of two toy aisles that are clearly, one being a blue boys aisle and one being a pink girls aisle.

Child’s play is serious business, both in terms of children’s development and in terms of market size (roughly a gajillion dollars).

Studies show the impact of toys on kids’ stereotypes and behaviors. While there has been some pushback to degendering toy aisles and removing explicit labeling of toys for “boys” and “girls,” there is also growing support for the degendering and desexualization of toys.

After all, if we really mean that kids should be all they can be, why can’t they play with it all too?

A young boy laying on the floor playing with a princess playset.

A young girl sitting on the floor playing with a set of trucks and firetrucks.

A Doll Like Me

Dolls are particularly important. They offer children an opportunity to see themselves and to engage in a caring relationship with someone who does – or does not – look like them.

In the influential Clark Doll Study many decades ago, black children were presented with two dolls, identical except for skin and hair color. Dr. Mamie Clark and Dr. Kenneth Clark were exploring questions of how segregation and discrimination had affected children’s sense of self.

The theory was that how society saw the children shaped how the children saw themselves which then shaped how they saw the toys.

A black and white picture of a young black boy being shown two baby dolls. One baby doll is black and one baby doll is white. The little boy is pointing at the white baby doll.

The black children showed a clear preference for the white doll over the black doll as the doll they would like to play with and that was “nice” and “pretty.”

The studies were cited in the landmark Brown v Board of Education Supreme Court case, which ruled that separate but equal facilities were unconstitutional.

Black and white portrait of Dr. Mamie Clark and Dr. Kenneth Clark. Dr. Mamie Clark is sitting and Dr. Kenneth Clark is standing over the right shoulder leaning forward.

Since then, r esearch has also shown that the dolls kids play with shapes how they see themselves.

Kids' play is high stakes.

A Doll is Born

This is all to say, GUESS WHAT. American Girl’s 2023 Girl of the Year is Kavika "Kavi" Sharma, an Indian-American girl from New Jersey that loves Broadway. That’s literally me.

I could never have imagined this as a child. Dolls didn’t look like me. Did they look like you? If they did, did you have dolls that looked like other kids?

This is a big deal.

A woman sitting on a couch holding the 2023 American Girl of the year doll. She is holding the doll in the box as well as a Kavi journal and another small book.

Check out my reaction to seeing Kavi for the first time.

Little Dolly would be giddy (and surely playing with Kavi in the laundry basket!).

Image of a video of Dolly Chugh unboxing her American Girl doll.

Culture Changing Moments

Change like this does not just happen. People make it happen.

People like my rock star, changemaker friend, Jess Weiner. This Forbes profile describes her as "a brand’s secret weapon ... a trusted advisor and strategic partner in culture-changing moments.”

Big culture-changing moments, like Mattel’s more inclusive Barbie dolls, Dove’s Real Beauty Campaign, and now, American Girl’s Girl of the Year (thank you, Jess, for sending me my very own Kavi!).

3 women sitting on a stage with a large screen behind them displaying Mattel's more inclusive Barbie dolls.

Yes, And …

I love how Jess explains her secret to changing culture. It stems back to her background in theater and a classic improv technique: “Yes / And":

YES, girls like to play with dolls AND so do boys.
YES, boys like to build things AND so do girls.
YES, American Girl dolls look like you AND you AND you AND me.

Cartoon display for The Smart Girl's podcast with images of Shay and Jess.

Be an Actionist

Few of us have Jess Weiner’s culture-changing influence on a large scale. But many of us have culture-changing influence in our own orbits. Jess calls it being an Actionist.

To enjoy Jess' inspiring wisdom, joy factor, and ability to transform Yes / And into action, be sure to check out her awesome blog and The Smart Girl's Podcast.

In the Wall Street Journal

I love Jess' idea of being an Actionist and am doing what I can over in Book Land to provoke thought and action.

I was thrilled to have a piece in the Wall Street Journal's 2022 Year in Review section based on my latest book ... and doubly thrilled that it was one of only 20% of digital features carried in the print edition. It's another perfect application of Yes / And.

In this quick video, I see my piece in print for the first time!

Print edition of the Wall Street Journal. On top is section titled Journal Report Year in Review, Looking Back at 2022 ... and Ahead. Underneath is a partially visible article titled U.S. History Has Good and Bad. Let's See Both. by Dolly Chugh showing a photo of Dolly.

Adorbs!!!

A MORE JUST FUTURE continues to get rave reviews from readers (with cute kids!) looking for a hopeful and actionable path :-). I hope you'll check it out in hardcover/ebook/audiobook or leave a review here!

3 different images in a collage. All three have little children holding the book A More Just Future and smiling.

As always, my goal in this newsletter is to give Actionists like you free, bite-sized, evidence-based, action-oriented, zeitgeisty tips on how to be more inclusive (check out past issues here). My hope is for this free, accessible content to reach as many hearts and minds as possible so feel free to share!

Photo credits: Photo credits: Personal collection of photos, Canva, Dolly the sheep, Dolly Parton in kitchen & Dolly overlay, Hello Song covers , Baby in laundry basket, Toy Aisle, Boy playing with Legos, Girl playing with trucks, Dr. Kenneth Clark & Dr. Mamie Clark here & here, Jess Weiner Instagram images, American Girl Doll,

I am learning so much from Anna McMullen, whose art of visual storytelling is fun and compelling. I cherish Katie Sutton’s dedication and appreciate her help teaching Anna and I mailchimp.

Special thanks to Jess Weiner, Maya Chugh Singh, Shalou Barth, Miya Oglesby, Allie Esslinger, and Sudesh Chugh.

Dolly Chugh is the Jacob B. Melnick Term Professor at the New York University Stern School of Business in the Department of Management and Organizations. She studies the psychology of good people and teaches leadership/management courses. All views are her own.