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a lot of the highly efficient tools and profound understanding I offer -
are channelled.
I just get them at occasional times and places -
they wake me up in the middle of the night,
pop up in the shower,
flicker on a casual walk in the sun,
surprisingly flow out of my mouth during a session.
So today, I'm going to share with you
a new technique that was received earlier this week;
It is definitely immature.
Why, then?
Because I was also encouraged to invite you
to check it out together with me,
and see if it has the potential to change life
and gain back inner peace, joy and freedom.
Just to briefly fill you in -
the intention was to create a little process one can apply
and get a quick desired win.
So I submitted a request to the universe, and hands off - let it come.
What came up was something around
'how to stop people pleasing - and magnetize effortless love, appreciation and collaboration'
(How do you like this subject?)
Followed by this sequence:
1. Start by recognizing pleasing-related events (either thoughts, feelings or actions) during your day.
2. For each event, write down in your notebook:
A. I wish I could ________ instead
B. How did performing the pleasing option feel?
Examples:
It was early afternoon and I planned to nap,
when my friend called and suggested going to the movies.
I went because I didn't want to disappoint her.
'I wish I could nap/say no thanks instead'
How did I feel performing the pleasing option:
Tired, forced, resistant.
My coworker blamed me for a customer service glitch earlier today,
while actually it was his fault because he didn't put the right note on the customer's file.
I didn't correct him because I didn't want to go into a conflict.
'I wish I could confront him with the facts instead'
How did I feel performing the pleasing option:
Belittled, furious, offended.
3. Look at the wish list:
Can you create in your imagination an ideal person,
who lives up to these truths?
How is this life enabled -
What traits do they have?
What do they feel and experience?
Which approach allows their way to be welcomed and respected?
How do they take place in the world?
From which inner place they conduct their relationships and connection with others?
Describe this person in writing:
- In present time
- Use positive language (what they DO have, how they DO feel)
- Use as many emotions and adjectives as you can see.
4. Now go again through the description,
and replace every He/She with: I'M.
How does it feel?
You can make adjustments, elaborate and enrich
until you actually read the best version of yourself.
5. Give this version a title:
'My ____ Version',
or
' ____ Me'
[independent, authentic, soft, curios etc.]
6. Take the time to read and get used to your new options,
maybe even over a few days -
mornings and evenings.
7. When you feel ready, do this:
Imagine this best version standing with you in the room.
Where is the right place for them to stand?
Vision them at their optimal spot.
Now, stand in front of them,
and slowly proceed, until you are stepping into them and merging.
you can go in and out, and make adjustments
until it feels totally natural.
Pay attention to your body -
level of tension, posture, balance etc.
How does it feel?
Take the time to relax and absorb the feelings.
8. Now, stay there and create strong 'anchors' -
clear notes to help you to anytime awake and revive this mode.
They can be a body gesture, a deep breath directed somewhere,
a color, a word or a phrase, an image...
Anything to ground you back into your greatness.
Start with what is coming up - you can always improve later.
9. Next time you hit a crossroad of pleasing or choosing your truth,
hold on for a moment;
Take a breath, recall your anchor,
and relax into your best version.
Merged with your greatness, focus inside and explore:
- How are you feeling right now?
- What do you really need and want?
- What little step can you take toward your freedom? -
Maybe suggesting an alternative option that will sit better with you (I would love to go to the movies, how about the early evening show?),
or an alternative approach to an offered story (I may have missed the note, can we check the customer's file together?)
10. How did it work?
What can you improve before your next chance to practice?
Try it and give me a feedback - of any kind,
we have the power to make light together!
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