What is Resistance?

I’ve been wondering a lot about resistance – the type of resistance that makes us avoid things that will ultimately help us.
 
For example, some of my clients share that they feel amazing at the end of our sessions but are dreading our sessions before we meet.
 
So yesterday I called Marv (my stepdad, a retired therapist who practiced for 40+ years) and asked him: “What is resistance?” 
 
“It’s usually when people don’t want to experience really painful feelings,” Marv said.
 
I felt his answer in my chest...
 
I have this book called “Healing the Shame that Binds You” that has sat on my shelf for years. Every six months, I take it off the shelf, read a few paragraphs that cut me to my core, and then put it back. Last week, I took the book off my shelf once more, putting it on my kitchen counter as a reminder to read, and feeling anxious and resistant whenever I looked at the title.
 
This morning, as the sun was rising, I finally did one of the inner child exercises from the book. I connected with my own inner child, giving her space to talk and feel and grieve in a way that was almost unbearably painful – I was racked with sobs. 

The relief I now feel, having released that grief that was pent up inside of me, is even sweeter than the honey in my green tea. I feel peaceful and steady, like a long, slow exhale.
 
That’s the thing about big, scary emotions – they crest and crash like waves, dissipating onto the shore. When we are brave and supported enough to feel them, we can experience immense relief in our minds, bodies, and spirits.

If you’re interested in learning and exploring more, with the support of a beloved community, you’re welcome to join my upcoming online workshop called, "What is Resistance?"

With Love,