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As you go about your life, your challenges sometimes seem so important, so big, so urgent. You must pass your science test. You must make the soccer team. You must get a date for the dance. As adults, we concern ourselves with many things--our family, our careers, our home. Our worries are not unjustified.
But maybe in life you'll be given the gift, perhaps in the form of a tragedy, to see how very small these things are. You'll see from far above. And about your life, like the view from a hot air balloon of the vast expanse over Lao, you won't help but recognize: it is beautiful.
When you come down, and come down you must, the world will look different. You'll sit in your house which is worth less than you owe and, joining hands before the meal with your family you'll pray, "How fortunate we are." At the site of where you laid your mother to rest, you'll say, "Thank you so much." The recent diagnosis far from your mind, you'll hold your spouse to your heart and whisper, "I love you like crazy."
-The Godmother
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Health care in Cambodia: When I was little and my father would take his mother to a new doctor, her first question always was, "Where did you go to medica sayl school?" My father was terribly embarrassed at her checking the doctor out. Now I live in a place not known for rule of law and a prominently displayed medical certificate might not be worth the paper it is printed on. And, yes, I find myself shyly asking the same question as my grandmother, "So... where did you study?"
Cambodia is generally not a good place to get sick. The medical books are in French, thanks to their colonizing the place, and that is one obvious hurdle. But the biggest challenge is that many doctors don't have what it takes to diagnose. They know the facts but they might not know how to use them. A few years ago, I had a bump on my finger, an obvious infection, and the doc said I had arthritis.
As I've seen for eight years with my critical thinking students, the situation is the same. They're masters at memorizing but not at application. Just this week, a math student asked me, "Why can't you just teach us the formulas?" I'm told my teaching gives my students "chur kabal" (a sore head).
So, in the case of doctors, if you don't have the right diagnosis, you won't get the right treatment. An issue.
Needless to say, I was suspicious a few weeks ago when on the same day I had an ultrasound and a mammogram, a "procedure" was recommended (this just after the doctor learned I have health insurance). But, The Godmother is right, just imagining during my two week wait being stuck in Cambodia (thanks to COVID-19) with breast cancer is enough to get some perspective and remember: "My life is pretty damn good."
The results were negative for cancer.
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You're welcome to share this email. The Godmother says, "The more the merrier!"
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Did you miss a previous Godmother's Advice email?
- #001: Khmer boxing & solving problems
- #002: Workers' commute & "making room"
- #003: Bright balloons & dangerous attractions
- #004: Bats and others' ways
- #005: Playing in the mud
- #006: Tattoos and bad habits
- #007: Make-believe
- #008: Dental and other care
- #009: Boat races and collaboration
- #010: Loads carried
- #011: Nothing beyond repair
- #012: Solid bricks
- #013: Toilet left standing
- #014: Flying a kite
- #015: Everyone is held
- #016: Dry fish in the sun
- #017: Little children
- #018: Worth looking for
- #019: Two-way windows
- #020: Heroes emerge
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- #021: A wide net cast
- #022: Take what you need
- #023: Make your own fun
- #024: See what the sun smiles on
- #025: Fly high
- #026: Open the treasure chest
- #027: Where greatness lies
- #028: Practice holiness
- #029: Say it
- #030: Read
- #031: Leave alone to grow
- #032: Judge the destination
- #033: Choke it down
- #034: Think in 3D
- #035: Counterproductive loads
- #036: Opportunity to rebuild
- #037: Just ask
- #038: Know what you believe
- #039: Fill a small jar
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Background about this email: Several years ago, I was feeling like an inadequate Godmother due to my absence in the US and, consequently, my absence in my Godsons' lives. I decided to send what little advice I have as someone who has been in the world for 30 years longer than they. Thus was born my Godmother's emails--a tidbit of advice each week. I decided to share these emails with friends and others because I feel that folks need some good, helpful or happy things in their Inbox these days. I hope these Godmother's advice emails are good, helpful or happy for you; otherwise, unsubscribe below.
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This email and my work in Cambodia is made possible by the Maryknoll Lay Missioners program through which I serve. To support me, use this secure online form. If you are outside the US, you can donate through PayPal.com (specify "maria_montello@yahoo.com" as the recipient).
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For checks, please mail to Maryknoll Lay Missioners, PO Box 307, Maryknoll, NY 10545-0307.
Note: Please designate "Maria Montello Mission Account" in the memo line for checks or in the "Comments" box for Web donations if you would like a portion of your contribution to go directly to support my projects. Otherwise, the full gift will go to the Missioner Sustenance Fund, which is cool too. That fund is used to pay out my living expenses and health insurance, and to keep the lights on at the MKLM headquarters.
All US-based contributions are tax deductible
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